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  • #407351
    ro
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    i was not setisfied with my breasts for most of the time groing up until recent years, but no one likes his body at the young age i think (and this thinking can be calming but not for a lifetime) ..

    i know obsessive questioning is never satisfied with answers, i want it to stop and not exsit . i feel like even if i would be diagnoused it wouldent help because i would still have this inner thought that im forgetting something or ignoring something or something is wrong with me for having all of these thoughts and needing help , diagnosys/psychotherapy.. i feel like such a normal person other then that so i dont want that to be true or go to an evaluation deep inside. (im soory for not following this advice, i tried that already and it takes a lot of mental stability and energy which i dont have, i dont want to start that all over again after i was OK for a long time now until the doughts came back)

    again i thank you so much..

    #407347
    ro
    Participant

    thank you Anita for the response
    i was not diagnosed with OCD, and the medications were taken after consolting with a medical doctor, it was mainly because i sufferd strees for several monthes (the only thing i meant by “you recomended” was to talk to someone, not to take any medications, im sorry that i was not clear)

    when i read your replay i understand that these matters are not real evidence of  sexual orientation, but it doesnt mean for sure that i am attracted to man and not to weman.

    how can i be sure in my sexuallity?

    haw can i be sure that im not in denail? how can i date man thinking i may be in denail ?

    in the past day (and i remember this thought from before ) i have been thinking to just give up and admit to myself just so i would not find it out layter in life get merried and find out get merried and not be attracted to man sexually or romenticly, and then the feeling of “hidding something (that im enjoing fantasies or that im not who i seem to be)” will disappear. then i start noticing my behaivior, maybe im manly (im really not, only im ny head)?

    i did read about it all – OCD , HOCD trying to figure out if its just intrusive thoughts or really my rael sexuality

    how can i be sure that im attracted to manaand not weman and not dought myself everytime? when a gay person pop on in the media and im trying not to notice so it wont confuse me

    it takes so much energy. so much thoughts about myself, when i think about other people question their sexuality and comparing myself to other peoples sexuallity i refer to them having or not having fantacies about their oun gender. if it would not exist i wouldent acctually be disterbd by this issue as much as i do. (my fantasies are mostly about being with big brested woman/ having big breasts and thats the only thing that attracting me in weman, not specific person involved at all or any other part of womens body)

    again thank you for helping.

     

    #407325
    ro
    Participant

    hello, thank you for commenting
    i did read i wrote because i did try psychotherapy  and even meds as i saw you reccomended, and i dont feel i can live like this anymore.

    all the things i mentiond befor is very confusing and makes me totally lose all intrest in my life as i used to live it. i just want to feel im straight and not question it all the time thinking im in denail, or the feeling that im hidding something (even when i did tell my perents)

    i just feel like im a completely different person when i think “maybe im in denail”

    i want this to stop

    #407322
    ro
    Participant

    This reply has been reported for inappropriate content.

    hello, thank you for commenting
    i did read i wrote because i did try psychotherapy  and even meds as i saw you reccomended, and i dont feel i can live like this anymore.

    all the things i mentiond befor is very confusing and makes me totally lose all intrest in my life as i used to live it. i just want to feel im straight and not question it all the time thinking im in denail

    i just feel like im a completely different person when i think “maybe im in denail”

    i want this to stop

     

    #407306
    ro
    Participant

    hello

    i have been feeling the same way
    when i was 19 someone asked me some question about a girl and i got so stressed about the question and asked myself if i am attrackted to weman, and didnt tell it to anybody for a very long time and sufferd from disturbing thoughts. all of my life i was intrested in man, i wasnt attracted to some of the man i have been with and i had the horrible qustion like maybe im not attracted to man? and it hit me now again at 25.. my concerns are that im not really intrested in man and i live in dinail.. i get aroused by fentesizing about women sex more than woman and man, when i hear about somone famous telling his gay/shes a lesbian i want to hear more and very intrested..

    i dont really want to live or fall in love or be with a woman, i was never intresten in a real woman , but having these fantasis + some guys i slept with that i wasnt attracted to + wanting to know about gay/lesbian people and “relate” to them makes me feel like im in denail and that deep inside i want to live with a woman, and i dont want that to be the truth.
    i read somtimse that all people question their sexuallity, but my ex boyfriends was so attrackted to me it is not possible for me to think that they have these kind of inner questions, which makes me feel more stressed.
    i see many people related to this thread, i wonder if they still have these questions/anxiety + all the media is pro-gay that it is more understanable and relatable but im not sure if i relate because i might be attracted to woman or because it just is relatable .

    i sufferd from disturbing thoughts latly. tried psychotherapy and having possitive thoughts but i cant live like this knowing that not all people have these questions and are super confinedt that they are straight, and seeing people suddenly coming out at 35 40 50 .. i feel i need ansuers or maybe sign from god

    somtimse i get panic attacks which i never had before

    please help me figure this out once and for all and live happy and without these toughts all the time cause i want to have normal life , thank you  , RO

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