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sam

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  • May 20, 2017 at 6:16 pm #150119
    sam
    Participant

    Anita, I hope it’s okay that I am checking back in. I was doing really well and trying to be more mindful of everything this week. However, this guy and I (from my original post) have still been talking. I am literally moving tomorrow. In the past couple of days, we haven’t talked as much. I know it is the right thing to do but I still can’t help but feel completely rejected. If I was staying here, there is no way I’d want to date him but I can’t help but still feel anxious and sad about the whole thing. He sent me a message this morning and I haven’t responded. I know I need to walk away but I can’t. I feel sad thinking about how much attention he’d been giving me (texting first thing in the morning, late into the night, asking me how my day was, etc). And now…hardly anything. How do I move on from this?

    May 14, 2017 at 2:14 pm #149413
    sam
    Participant

    Thank you, I will look into it! I’ve been thinking a lot today about all of this.

    I’m realizing while I strive for perfection in all aspects of my life, I feel pretty complete in a lot of them. I have a lot of good things going for me and I feel at peace with a lot of things. However, I think some of the reason I seek out and get anxious about relationships is that in my mind it’s the one thing I do not have. I know I touched on this earlier but it is becoming clearer the more I think about it. In my mind, being in a relationship would complete everything going on in my life. So that is why I am happy when I meet someone or a guy texts me, because I feel like I am closer to achieving that perfection. This has been very interesting to think about!

    May 31, 2015 at 10:29 am #77528
    sam
    Participant

    I kinda love that idea Inky, only because I’m pretty terrible at it! I think my planning and perfectionism causes me to have expectations of everything. And I think that can get tricky when it comes to dating. I tend to get let down a lot.

    I have tried the online dating and I get so bored! One of my friends goes on so many dates but I think I’m too picky so I tend to push guys off. I also am terrified of getting hurt. BUT I like your advice and it might be good for me.

    I think what I am trying to balance is putting myself out there, not having expectations, having fun but also not searching for someone just to make me happy.

    And that guy did text me back…and we’ve talked some. I ended up putting myself out a little bit (more than I’m used to) and I haven’t heard a response yet. I think either he’s dealing with his own things, not as into me as I originally thought or just as terrified as me (we are not in the same city and he admitted to being nervous around me and being terrible at the dating stuff). I think I’m going to try to focus on myself but also allow more people in with little expectations!

    May 29, 2015 at 4:51 pm #77482
    sam
    Participant

    I’m trying to take it slow but I’m scared he’s already disinterested. There’s really nothing to base that on other than he hasn’t responded to my text in the amount of time I have hoped. I just don’t know how to live my life without being concerned about meeting a guy or what not. I’m so anxious at this point because I’m stressed he doesn’t like me, he changed his mind, I did or said something wrong, he won’t talk to me again, etc, etc, etc.

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