If she left you because you had troubles looking for a job, she wasn’t worth it.
I hate to be so direct, but you shouldn’t try to keep close a person who behaves like this. I know it’s hard.
When I’ve been dumped by my first love I couldn’t even believe it. It was a rough time for me and I kept thinking that maybe he was doing it for me, in a way. I have done EVERYTHING to convince him to fix our problems and try again, but after he treated me awfully I simply got that that wasn’t the person I fell in love with anymore.
You will always remember her and the way you loved each other, but you also need to understand that it’s over. It’s hard as hell, I know, but move on. Don’t focus on the fact that you won’t find someone like her, you can still be happy. Focus on yourself, get your life back and sort it out. Think of your projects and what you want to achieve as a person. Every relationship, even a one with her if it’s possible, will come after that.
Been there, done that.
Well, I know it might seem hard and kinda cruel to just send him to a psychiatric hospital, but manic depression is a serious mental condition and without professional help it would just get worse and worse. You told he has seen a psychiatric a couple of times, but depression is something that requires at least one session a week. I have been there myself, good psychological support can make the difference.
In regards to this secret you talk about, I think that you should tell your partner every single thing that is or was important in your life and that might affect it. Now, I don’t know the full story and I could be wrong, but my personal philosophy is “be open”.
I wish you the best with your partner,
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