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Viewing 8 posts - 61 through 68 (of 68 total)
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  • in reply to: Question Are we born with a Purpose or do we create our own? #89982
    who
    Participant

    To: Anita
    I love the simplicity of your words, very impelling!
    Meaning to live is to die! that is the purpose.
    For me it’s a sweet bitter victory. Although true, hard to swallow. I mean as people our life span isn’t long. with all the pressures of life, plus dealing with ourselves, then we die. (Purpose)
    Wow I guess I thought that there be more to this, but who am I.
    Thanks! Guess I should be grateful that I’m even here to experience life for what it is.

    in reply to: Question Are we born with a Purpose or do we create our own? #89980
    who
    Participant

    Much appreciation! to:Jack & Anita

    I really love your words for thought!
    I agree on both comments, first with Jack because the inner self is who we really are before we wur here, meaning our subconscious. The mirror has reflected back on me. I’ve been so vein about looks, money, jobs, people pleasing etc. To the point where my life is out of control. Instead I should work on my inner self, meaning the spiritual path.

    To Jack question”
    Are we like (Yen and Yang) meaning the inner self is Good and the outer self is Bad?
    Inner as in like you said, spiritual and how we act, treat others, and choices that we make.
    Outer as in a false sense of purpose, being side tracked by life, material things and career, things that don’t last, temporary.

    Is that why us as humans beings battle ourselves so much, because we have 2 different things going on at the same time?
    Outer and inner self.
    Or can they both co-exist without issues?
    I don’tknow?

    in reply to: Am I forever a screw up? #89978
    who
    Participant

    To: Anita

    I read over what you wrote. You made a lot of points clear to me.
    Meaning Loving myself and the inner child.
    Letting go.
    Taking care of myself.
    And being there for my son.

    I always admired people who are honest, even though that’s not who I am.
    I’m working on it..

    I’ve been so close to achieving all of these life term goals.(Meaning) taking care of my son. Family. Job and money. living on my own. positivity within self.

    So close to where I can almost grab it, but somehow it vanishes into the distance, where my journey seems longer and longer, to the point of killing my energy to exist.
    I feel as if I’m not learning my life lessons. Or I make horrible choices, even when they seem to be clear.

    in reply to: Am I forever a screw up? #89977
    who
    Participant

    To: Jack
    I completely understand about the whole family thing, meaning about being judge tuff!.
    I am what you call a black sheep. I have a younger step brother 21 years old (same mom ) different dad.
    He’s the good one, that everybody wants around. He has the great job, lives on his own, plus can move anywhere and be okay. He stays in touch with the family and visits them often. I’m happy for him, but at times jealous! You would think at my age I wouldn’t give a you know! But I do. I guess because of the way my family talks to him compared to me.
    But I can’t be too hurt about it, because of when ever I contacted them it was because I needed money or help.
    I don’t stay in contact with them, because I don’t have much to say. Or nothing positive going on in my life.
    Even in the short past I tried to call a few times to say hi” and check up on them. I got shut down fast with the WHAT DO YOU WANT ATTITUDE!
    It didn’t seem natural so I stopped..
    Truth for me at times is hard, depending on the situation. I Lie because my life kinda sucks. And I want to feel good about myself.

    in reply to: Am I forever a screw up? #89948
    who
    Participant

    To: Anita

    You’ve said a lot of things that I can truly think about.. you gave me words for thought”. Once again I THANK YOU!
    I’m not going to sit here and act like I’m grateful or Mr. perfect.
    Or like I can comprehend everything said to me all at once. I still lie when it comes to my life.
    real (example) when people or peers ask me about my work or life. I lie to them and say things like I have a great paying job and life is amazing. Acting like I have my shit together, when the truth is I don’t..
    Even some of my close friends don’t know about my son. Because I’m to afraid to admit that I’m not taking care of him, and the child support thing.
    Instead I lie about my son and claim that he’s my little brother. Just because when I do, everyone accepts it no questions asked. But the minute that I say I have a son and he doesn’t live with me, plus child support. people, peers, past work mates, and females talk to me like a looser.
    They also express stuff about guys being dead beat dads. So I lie about it. I really hate it when I do. So at times I just ignore or change the subject.

    in reply to: Am I forever a screw up? #89946
    who
    Participant

    Thank You Inky!
    I mean that because of your understanding to my situation..
    You are right, I do need a plan, something that I never knew how to do in my life. And if I did plan for something, it was only for an easy way out! which never works. The truth is finding direction is my problem. Not sure on what that means but it’s how I felt for many years.
    So I will get that book, soon as I get a little cash in my pocket.
    Because of my child support, I must find a job fast, it adds up. I’m already behind.
    My son doesn’t live in the same state, he’s in California and I’m in Louisiana
    Patients for me is somewhat thin, mainly because of being rejected in life, plus all the stuff I put myself through. Sometimes it’s hard for me to believe in anything.
    There is so much out there meaning life. That the lines between right and wrong, God or no God, are all starting to blend in together.

    in reply to: Am I forever a screw up? #89927
    who
    Participant

    Hahaha nice, THANKS Jack! for the funny but truthful way of telling me that this screw can change for the better.
    Man 10 years from now sounds great. Hope I still have all my hair by then. I stress even when I sleep.

    in reply to: Am I forever a screw up? #89923
    who
    Participant

    THANK YOU! for your kindhearted words of expression Anita.

    No matter what my mom has done to me in my past, I still love her so very much. And I don’t like to see anyone suffer.
    If it wasn’t for her, I’d be on the streets right now with no where to go. She is the provider (meaning) food, electric, water, etc.
    Even though our past sucked, we are building on our relationship toward each other, meaning respect and getting to know one another.
    I haven’t been around my mom in over 31 years because of our issues. It’ crazy because the one person that I never wanted to live with, I’m living with meaning my mom. (life) has a crazy way of showing us things. I truly believe that we are living together to patch things, before time is up! we are not getting any younger.
    I don’t know about life or the course that it has for me.

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 4 months ago by who.
Viewing 8 posts - 61 through 68 (of 68 total)