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ZenithParticipant
My husband tells me that setting rules will push away from us. She will become more rebellious.
ZenithParticipantThats what I keep telling my husband. She should learn how to spend her alone time. She cannot go the neighbors house everyday or every weekend. I dont know why my husband gives in so easily. He has the typical indian mentality when it comes to parenting. May be because she is an only child. He keeps telling me that kids get bored and they need/want kids to play all the time. we take her to library and she talks to kids over there. We had a great time on Friday as a family. We went to out to ice cream, then chuck-e cheese, then had pizza. But after all that she wasnt happy. No matter how much we do nothing is good enough for her. My husband prepares her lunch everyday. He cooks what she likes. She hasn’t been eating lunch for the past one year. She is wasting food since one year that triggers me a lot. She skips eating that food is spicy or its not spicy. I dont know how I deal with her at this point. I feel so lost. She throws a fit because she doesnt like spicy food. I add hell lot of butter to her food. I taste it before giving it to her and its not all spicy. She says she has very less spice tolerance. If she wants a toy she will keep us nagging for half day. She doesnt want to brush her hair every day because its tangled. Every task we do is mundane for us. I dont know what’s going on her little brain. She is cute though and fun to be with. I love her a alot.
ZenithParticipantYeah I know. Thats what I tell my husband. Dont spoil her. I feel like such a bad mom. I dont know i give her all the cuddles. I say I love you to her everyday. I get triggered when she doesnt listen to me. Should I take her to a therapist or should I go to therapy ?
ZenithParticipantShe want to buys a to toy or key chain every week. My husband spoils her with all the toys.
ZenithParticipantMy husband and I are pretty friendly with her. She says she is bored at home and feels alone at home. She always want somebody to play with. I take her to parks or plan something during during the weekend. I am pretty busy during the week. My husband picks her up and helps with homework. Its just she keeps bugging or she doesnt listen to me when I say nicely for 3 or 4 times. Sometimes its hard for me to regulate my anger and I yell at her. I know I have to change this habit. Sometimes I get frustrated with her behavior.
ZenithParticipantI will look into the ODD stuff. I did tell my husband while ago about taking my kid to a therapist. He brushed off saying that its normal for kids to act like this at this age.
ZenithParticipantShe was a nice kid until 4 but then everything changed once she started kindergarten. She is very good at school with teachers and friends. Once she is back home she gets into the irritable mood. She doesnt help with anything. Like cleaning up the toys, cleaning up after she eats, She needs help with everything. If we ask for help she says its boring or its not her responsibility. The list goes on. My husband sent her to the neighbors house on Monday to play with T. T is busy with her friends during the weekend. They meet atleast once in a week. When the weekend starts she will start asking about T in the morning. I dont know what to do. My husband tried one weekend and the other weekend I tried. The neighbor was busy. My kiddo is obsessed about T. We used to spend the weekends together when my neighbor was close to me. So the kids. I am the one to blame and my kiddo got used to it. Now the neighbor spends the weekend with her new set of friends. She replaced us so easily!!
ZenithParticipantHey Anita.. How are you doing ? I am having a bad day today. Its the time of the month I guess. My little one is giving me a hard time now a days. Its been happening since last year once she started kindergarten. She keeps throwing fit for every little thing. From waking up in the morning to the time she goes to bed. She wants control over everything she does. Now a days she talks back and saying really mean things to us. Its hurting my mental health. Recently, I stopped talking to my neighbor as she is busy with her other set of friends/ group. She misses my neighbor kid. She wants to meet her everyday. Lets name her T. She did the same thing last year too. She always want to play with X everyday even after playing with kids at school. But X is also busy with her own friends. My kid keeps saying that she is alone and X as lot of friends .I put my ego aside, two weeks ago I asked my neighbor to send her kid to our house. She said yes and didnt send her. Later texted on saying that they slept. During the weekend, I wanted to arrange a play date and asked her again. She said she has plans with her group and she wants to go with them to the park as thier kids come along. It hurt me so much. I hate her now. I am trying to distance myslef from her. but my little one keeps reminding about T. I hate it. She has time to meet her group of friend very often like three four times in a week. But she doesnt have time for me now. I am trying to move on but my kid always reminds me about her.
ZenithParticipantLol..I didnt notice that.
ZenithParticipantI am doing OK.
ZenithParticipantHi Anita.. How are you doing ?Just thinking about you. How is life treating you ?
ZenithParticipantLol..Sometimes I am stubborn just like my kid. Only forgiving her will give me the peace. Thats what I noticed in the last couple of weeks. I was at peace when I forgave her but I still dont like her. I have to let go off the expectations too.
ZenithParticipantI dont want to do it.
ZenithParticipantlol. It sounds easy but hard to do.
ZenithParticipantBy forgiving her mistakes and still keep inviting her.
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