Hey inky, natalie, and anita thanks for replying!

Anita, yes I do relate to your experience sort of. Any change, good or bad, or any event at all could trigger a manic episode for my dad. So if I had schools exams they would trigger it, my birthday would trigger it, and he was most abusive during manic episodes so I dreaded any life event or change in routine . He was also very obsessive, so if I went to say a friends house he would call constantly, keep asking me what time I would be back, would give my mum a really hard time while I was out, mostly “why did you let her go, ask her to come back” just on repeat for hours on end. so I was always in trouble when I got back home even thou I rarely went out,came home before dinner, and my friends were all very clean cut. After a certain point I accepted that if went and had fun at my friends house I would have to pay for it when I got back home.