Hello John,

I’ve been following the thread, but might have missed details.

But with this last post, I thought I’d chime in and add my thoughts.  I understand you are in a relationship with a woman, not your ex.  Your ex is in a relationship with someone, but has told you that it’s not like a real relationship.

I do think that, given where your heart is, you need to talk to your current girlfriend and fill her in on what’s happening.  I’m guessing she doesn’t know you are texting your ex?  Also, I wonder how you would feel being with someone who loves you but isn’t as crazy about you as their former boyfriend?  Would you want to be in a relationship with someone who felt that way about you?

I also think it would be a good idea to let your ex initiate any texts from this point forward.  She may very well be trying to sort things out, and sort out how she feels about you, and also sort out whether she wants to get back with you, and what that would mean.  She might want to be sure about how she feels before going forward.

And, then, it might be that she just likes the comfort of knowing you are there, knowing how much you love her.  And she might not have any intention of getting back with you.

I don’t like playing games either, and so would let this rest for now, not contacting your ex in any way, and waiting for her to reach out to you.  When she does, that might be the time to have a heart-to-heart talk with her and tell her how confusing this is for you and what her intentions are behind contacting you.  She already told you it wouldn’t be a good idea for you to see each other…at this point.  It almost seems like she wants to keep you hanging around.  I would want to know if that’s true, and why she is doing that.

Those are just my thoughts.  I know you are looking for some direction, and I hope the people in this thread have given you that.

Airene