Kkasxo,

Absolutely. I definitely still have my moments where I feel so sad, but they are much fewer and far between than they were even just a few months ago.  You just have to be gentle with yourself and patient. Keep learning about attachments and read about how to learn to not need them. Your need of them CAN be changed or altered. I don’t think it’s realistic to think that we can ever live completely without attachment (or at least I don’t think I would even want to), but we can definitely improve to the point where we are able to let those attachments go much easier and sort of live without expectations and to not let future attachments develop to the point of addiction. You will get to the place I’m at and we will both get to a place where we are no longer affected by our breakups. Just have to give it some time and do some soul-searching in the process  🙂

I think you’ll find cognitive dissonance interesting, too. I learned about it earlier this year when I was wrestling back and forth about my own feelings on whether to try to talk to him or just leave him alone (because not talking to him didn’t feel right but I also knew we were broken up and that talking to him would only increase my attachment), and that’s when I went looking for what that feeling was and how to handle it. haha. That feeling of back and forth and the discomfort that comes with it WILL go away in time though, so you have that to look forward to.

• This reply was modified 6 years ago by Valora.