Dear Rooo,

I’ve been dealing with this too and this is what I’m learning:

Think about someone in your life that you love with all your heart. This may be a child, a close friend, a relative.

Think deeply about the emotion involved, how your heart bursts with love & compassion for them, what you would do for them, how you would help them if they were going through difficult times and asked for your support, how you would react if they’d told you they were having a bad day or they’d made a mistake that was upsetting them.

These actions and feelings are exactly the same way you should be treating yourself.

You need to love YOURSELF as passionately and as deeply as you would another. This means you don’t beat yourself up for making mistakes, you pay yourself compliments, you treat yourself.

In doing this, you may need to be assertive, you may need to set boundaries, you must learn to say “No” to people & demands that drain your energy or time or finances, you must learn to be “selfish” for your own needs and you don’t always need to provide explanations or apologise for doing these things. You are also allowed to change your mind.

Always treat yourself, do things and take actions that make YOU feel good – This could be booking yourself a massage, planning a trip, engaging in a hobby that you love, even the simplest actions such as making yourself a nice cup of tea or looking a mirror and thinking how great your hair looks today.

Always practice gratitude. What made you smile today? What silver lining came from a difficult situation? How did you make someone feel good? How did you help someone else out? – It is essential to continue to show kindness to others and deep appreciation to help boost our own mental health & promote well-being in many different areas of our lives.