Anita,

the ex husband is upset and stressed out about this significant move Coming up.  He lashes out instead of communicating.  Yesterday I told him the owner of my gym is giving me 2 months free and then if I can afford to continue going, he would give me a discounted rate. We were discussing finances and cut backs etc.  my ex said to me “ did you get on your hands and knees in front of him?  Did you beg for him to let you work out for free?” I got up and left the room but am still angry.  I can’t call my mother because she is away at a tennis tournament and last time I spoke to her she made it very clear she has her own problems to deal with and for me to figure it out on my own.  This is her tone 75% of the time.  My brain startes thinking about M. And yesterday I thought again about stopping by his house but I didn’t.  I really can’t talk to my dad too much.  He has to take benzodiazepines daily but is on a low dose. SSRI’s and other meds did not relieve the daily panic attacks.  This started 2 years ago; we visited for Christmas and I was at the ER 3 times in 2 days. I took over as the oldest my mom practically had a breakdown. It has hurt their marriage and they are both struggling.  He’s going to different doctors and trying to get off the benzodiazepines but this situation has aged him.

Lindsey