Dear Anita,

Anger go to place.  Yes, well you said that it is important I do not lash out at my husband anymore.  And here look – there I go again.

There is a lot of anger, perhaps maybe time to go back to the exercise, to get back to the angry roots (which are far deeper than of course anger at random people and lack of sleep) – I don’t know.

Maybe I need a time out – a big one…hmm what does that even mean? God, maybe I do need to go back on some medication? No, I don’t think so – I need to be more mindful, and know my anger-go to place is not right.  He is human, it is stupid to get angry at him for wanting to stay out late when he is stressed.  It is wrong to get angry at him when his cousin treated me poorly in London.  It is wrong of me to accuse of him for being immature – and allowing others to take our energy (horrific wife)

As far as work, yes less grueling, the physician I am working with is not fast paced or high energy.  Which today, of all days, is a relief.  It will allow me to go slower and rest between cases.  As far as the stretchers – there is not because I am in an outpatient setting (not a hospital) so we don’t have as many staff members, and we turn over much quicker (which is usually a good thing because higher efficiency better hours, no late hours or call).  You win some, you lose some.