Grenada- sorry I meant to write this but overlooked it in my last post. Maybe you could show the person you love my post and just ask them to consider again and try to confront the guilt and anxiety rather than being too scared. I think in my case I tried to do what I felt was the right thing for everyone but I knew at the time, and have felt since, that also came at a cost to myself. A cost I am still paying. Whilst he is happily moved on. However I can understand how fear is so hard to deal with and when I feel fear, I literally can’t think straight. Everything feels fuzzy and i can’t actually consider rationally anything apart from what is in front of my own nose. The future seems scary and I feel at a loss and overwhelmed. So maybe that is how the person you love feels. Wanting something with one hand but also too scared to let go of the hand they are holding already. I do regret being scared and not just being able to follow my feelings as I did love him, but at the same time there felt like there was more to it than feelings eg loyalties, history, pressure from family, fear, worry, etc not to say that these things are more important than personal happiness but they could also be clouding Thier judgement or making it hard for them to make a decision. The person I loved trusted himself well and knew if he went after what made him happy he would be happy. A “grab the bull by the horns” type person. I admired that. But I was not like that. It was simple and straightforward to him in some ways, but for me, less so. I felt alot of weight about what I “should do” on my shoulders and despite my love and depth of feelings, I could not commit. People have said to me since if you loved him truely you would of done anything. Maybe that is true. I don’t know. I did truely love him in my experience of love and still do in ways now- hence this post about moving on and struggling. He said to me he would have no regrets as he really tried everything he could for us to be together but I do not have the same comfort. The fact he had tried everything allowed him to move on but I think why I struggle is that I still have the what if. ‘if’ I had left, we could of been happy and soulmates and together now. But I didn’t and so that is that. That makes it very hard for me.