John, I think it’s finally time that you stop feeling sorry for her and kick. her. out.  Her having the option to leave and not taking it means she’s definitely taking advantage of you.

This wasn’t YOUR opportunity, it was HER opportunity and she didn’t take it because she has you.  What she is doing now isn’t like what you did with your ex-girlfriend. You didn’t take advantage of your ex just so you could hold on.  You may not have fully let her go emotionally, but you DID let her go off to do her own thing and often since then, it has been her contacting you. Your girlfriend, however, is USING YOU in order to hold onto you. That is soooo much different. So if anything… you don’t have to feel guilty anymore because now you are very clearly being taken advantage of and it’s time for her to go.