I see your points.  It’s just very hard.  As far as them bumping into each other.  That wouldn’t happen, we are in different towns far apart.  There is only one or two reasons I could think of.  1.  My ex was curious about me and my life and reached out to her because she couldn’t reach me.  or 2.  my best friends wife contacted her to find out for herself why she did this to me.  I really do not see any other reason why either person would have contacted each other.

It’s all very very confusing and odd timing.  The reason I say that is because on October 15th i sent my friends wife a text with a pic of an old FB reminder post I forgot to delete.  It was about the last weekend we spent together out of town and how nice it was 2 years ago.  I asked her “why am i such a mess, that i wish i could be happy for what I have instead of miserable for what I lost, that it’s been 2 years and i still miss her and think about her every day.”

At that time (Oct 15th) as far as I knew they were not FB friends.

Then, on Oct. 28th is when I saw that they were friends on FB.  WOW.  how’s that for a “coincidence”.  Ugh.  Just seems very odd to me.  Literally there is no one in each others lives besides me that would cause their paths to cross.  and it is almost physically improbable that they would.

I will ask her about it when the time is right.  I do need to know why and who reached out to who.   The problem is that she has changed also.  She is not the woman she used to be.  I’ve known her for over 20 years and she has become more of a selfish, two faced person.  Very hard to still have the love and respect for her as my sister(what i’ve always considered her as) that I used to.  In fact last summer I found out that she had been cheating on my best friend with the same guy that she was “talking to” almost 2 years ago.   They are working it out.  Out of respect for both of them(mostly my best friend), i supported it and was there for each of them.  Then for her to do something like this and not even have the courtesy to tell me or ask me if it would bother me.  Especially after all i have confided in her and poured my soul out to her.  She even told me once that if i EVER started seeing her again, that she would not be friends with her.

Like i said, it’s just very confusing and the timing…  also given the fact that my ex reached out to me about the same time.  AGAIN.  Which speaking of that, i did entertain that.  I played that word game with her off and on.  we chatted on the game just a couple times, nothing substantial, just surface talk.  I haven’t heard from her in over a week now(which is probably best).  Typical of her tho.  The nice thing is that it’s not really bothering me like i thought it would.  It’s actually solidifying what i think she is doing.  I think she was lonely(because her man was still working in another state) and when she gets that way started thinking of me and reached out.  I’m pretty sure he has been back home now for a week or so.  Kind of explains a lot.

All this being said, i think (i could be way off) that my ex, couldn’t handle the idea of me with another woman.  She hated her from the start, even though she was in bed with her man well before I even met her and she didn’t even know her.  I think that my ex did do something(cheated on me somehow-phycially or emotionally) and could never admit it and she always felt guilt for that.  She showed many signs of it when we were at the end of our relationship.

In the end none of that matters.  I know that.  It’s just things I think about and i really appreciate this forum and being able to express myself.  thank you for listening.