Dear ninibee,
thank you for getting back to me about my question. Your original question, the title of your thread was “Am I too sensitive? Being blocked on Facebook?” Looking at all you wrote I don’t think so, but.
I think you have been lonely at college, and it hurts being lonely. Feeling excluded is very tough on social animals like us humans. It’s a cliché but true that thousands of years ago being excluded from a group meant mortal danger and our body still reacts accordingly. I would also assume that this wasn’t how you expected college to be like. So here is facebook guy, having it all with his group of close friends, posting about how he cares for people and at the same time treating you like this! How frustrating! So you lashed out, “do you realize you treat people like shit?” I think it wasn’t facebook guy in particular. It was him, his friends, your roommate, her friend club girl and all the other people who for some reason or another ignored you. You had enough and decided to take a stand. Which is great: no more just taking it, you were taking a stand, calling him out with (and here I am making an assumption) maybe also a vague idea of renegotiating the relationship “you say you care for people, why not –ME-?” makes sense to me. The thing is he too is a person, with a right to accept and reject people as he sees fit for himself. He can even avoid people he doesn’t feel comfortable with for some reason. And suddenly you realize you “made this 10x worse” for yourself. So taking a stand this time didn’t work. I would chalk it up to a learning experience. The intention was good (not taking everything) but maybe the approach can be improved upon. You could think about what you would do different in a similar situation. Once you are done with that, no more staying awake about this.
In the meanwhile the situation changed and maybe facebook guy is not so important anymore anyway. You wrote ”well, now what?” I would say take one step after another, nothing else to do. Figure it out one after another. Do you already have some plans?
As for therapy, I had those ”well, now what?” times too. Traditional talk therapy for me was all about talking about the past and it got me a bit further, but didn’t help in the present much. It was only with Cognitive behavioral therapy that I got real hands-on advice for the present, and that’s what I would advise for you too. Also different therapist can vary in quality and how they fit with different clients.
Full disclosure: I have my own thread on loneliness here, so when I give advice I feel a bit like a hypocrite. But thought I would write down my thoughts anyway.
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 