@Jay2023

That can happen after a high day, but it’s okay. Just got to learn how to surf through or against the wave..like you said an early night and some sleep will aid in reachieving that revitalised feeling again.

Also don’t forget to commend yourself on your progress. 3 weeks NC is an achievement. Bit by bit you’ll be further than you thought. You’re not purposefully wallowing or self pitying. You’re feeling the sadness and recognising it’s normal but actively trying to carry on. So keep at it!

You’re doing the right thing letting your mum decide. Like I said with time naturally communication dies down or becomes less bothersome.

So its just boils down to immaturity and inexperience in men?

The cold facts of life are that no one is obligated to stick around and put up with the other’s bullshit. You should never get complacent becayse no one deserves to live a life filled with stress and emotional pain. You can’t keep someone waiting while you figure out what you really want from life.

Your previous ex rejecting you when you were like that, was the most powerful step she could take in moving forward in life even though she loved you. In the end it was your actions that resulted in that moment. I guess you had to learn the hard way when a woman is done – she’s done.

It is good to hear maybe not to you that she moved on, it may help you heal deep down to make real amends, re engage and express what you just said to me to her. Tell her you are happy she found what she deserved in a letter if meeting would not be welcomed. I doubt anyone would not want to hear that even if they found peace themselves.

It may be the catalyst to letting go of regret and trying to fill a void. It may help you make better choices and set better boundaries for yourself too. Just an idea.

In addiction recovery there’s a 12 Step recovery process, so step 8 and 9 includes the practice of recognising how your behavior has harmed others and seeking to repair the mistakes and damage caused during that phase directly or indirectly if it will cause harm.

I think to become better humans and have better relationships we should do this type of reflection and action taking regardless to demonstrate our new way of life. It shows your intentions and actions are aligned.

As they all say on this thread. In time, this too shall pass. On your down days stay clear of socials and find a hobby to distract you. I know whats it like opening Instagram and seeing a picture of your friends new baby or engagement and although you’re happy you feel you are losing in life. That comes from our own train of thoughts. You need to reframe them. Once you do it consistently you see things differently.