Dear Neverdyed,

you’re welcome. No need to worry about popping up only when you need help. That’s what this forum is about – people asking for help, and then others hopefully answering if they feel they can help in some way. That’s different than being in a relationship, where constancy and dedication to each other is important.

Back to that pattern, if I can’t recall where it stems from in my childhood, would you suggest “persuading” myself to believe that I’m innocent?

Perhaps the pattern has to do with your mother accusing you of being selfish, and you believing her? I remember we talked about it a while ago…  Try to list everything you feel guilty about in your life (perhaps you can share some of that here), and then we can see how it may be related to your childhood.