@Jay2023  I read your posts, and it seems to me I feel really similar on some points. I also don’t remember when was the last times I completley got over someone unless I meet someone else that got me interested.
Even before relationships, I had crushes, until I met my nex crus. I’m not sure if this is normal? However there are people who feel like this, we are not the only ones.

Actually, now, being single 10 monts, which is the most since I’ve been 23, I’m starting to get over my ex. Not completley, though. And I am chatting with someone else, so maybe that’s contributing. However, if I saw a pic of my ex with someone else, it would affect me, I know that.

I guess there are people who always think that they can find someone better in relationships, and people like me, who are afraid they won’t find anyone better.. until they do. And I had low self confidence through my 20s. I don’t anymore, but now I project another problem – I know I am handsome enough and smart, and there are definitely guys who would like me, but I feel like there’s noboy here. And there was not many people I’ve meet in those last months. It’s like I always find a problem in my mind. First, I thought I was not handsome enough, now there are no guys my age who I like that are single.

Also, I understand when you say ” I just feel like nothing is moving along for me at the moment and I know I have to be patient as these things take time”. I have that feeling still. I was sad for months, I cried almost every day. I don’t know. But I don’t have that “joie de vivre”. I’m kind of bored. Yes, I have friends and nice time with them, but them weekends or vacarions come, and friends go on trips with their partners, and I’m sitting at home. So iI tell my friends I have to be patient and better times will come. Summer is coming and I love summer, but I don’t know who will I even be able to go to beach with. I’m not mad mat my friends, not at all, I think they have right to do what makes them happy, and I would do similar probably, in their position. At least maybe before I experienced this myself, bein last one single during the pandemic. Now, I think I know it’s so hard, so if one of my friends broke up, I would go out with her sometims probably, because now I know how hard it is.

I know people will tell me I shoudl be happy whether in relationship or not.. But I guess my biggest fear is being alone. And I’ve been already alone a lot, even in my previous relationships. Yes, we are all going to get alone eventually, when we get old, even if we have families. But I don’t want to spend big part of my life alone. The thought of going to work and coming in a empty home in my 40s scares me.