Hey Anita I am doing fine

I hope you are doing good too.

Sorry for my disappearance, I wasnt in the right space of mind at that time.

I would also want to update you

That I had done a lot of thinking after that, and I realised that I would rather be more fine than keeping in touch to some extent rather than gng completely no contact since it was making it difficult for us to work together on the same project.

So, I talked with him and I told him how I was not over whatever had happened but I  am ready to let it go slightly, for the sake of the friendship that we have and just keep to it so things dont remain awkward.

He was obviously thankful that I made that decision. So, we were successfully able to work on the project together and I felt he kept trying to get close to me and trying to gain my sympathy by asking for my opinion on his personal issues which he just wanted to share with me. Started sharing philosophical quotes with me every morning  to keep me motivated for the coming rough days in the club(thats for all the members btw) and other stuffs

Just that,During the project we used to end up have random calls at times (twice or thrice in total) where we used to end up talking for 1-2 hrs just like we used to have previously, although I used to be very careful that we dont go off topic , just general stuffs mostly and club related (there were a lot of issues happening in the club during tht time that used to be very stressful at times)

I still wanted to be around him, but I knew this was just the initial chase that narcissist pull, to get the victim to fall for them again.

I didnt want all this, so, everytime he used to discuss any personal issue or try to act overly caring , I used to ask him to cut the crap (in a politer way)

Long story cut short, he has been bothering me lesser, after thr project got over, because I never call him on myown, so it might seem clingy for him to force something.

I have been strong up until now,giving him the clear msg that things can never be exactly the same but somewhere or the other till date I feel everyday a bit sad that he was probably never really into me otherwise instead of these half as efforts he would have really had the guts of not letting me go, for him I was never as special as he was for me.

Ps :I dont think it has something to do with my past exactly, because I have never been stuck on anything, and always seen it as an opportunity to grow, but this right now is just a void, I feel alone, betrayed and kind of unlovable to this day (which I know isnt true but I just do feel this way)