Dear Javier,

Today, I cried uncontrollably for 4hours. I miss my mother. I’m all alone, I feel useless and unwanted.

It’s the child within you, Javier. When you were experiencing abuse and violence, you were truly a helpless little child, and that was your reality. You couldn’t escape it. It made your life horrible. But now, you are not helpless any more. You are an adult, you had successes in your life, you were loved and appreciated, you were the lead engineer on a cruise ship. You had abilities, you achieved things, you were not a loser.

Covid pushed you into a dark pit again, into the childhood trauma, which is now hitting you with full strength. But you need to understand that there is also a capable adult in you. You aren’t a helpless child any more, you can now help yourself and build yourself up again. You have the ability to do it – because you have done it before!

Activate your adult self, who will comfort your child self. Be an adult to your child self, like you have been to your nieces. Start loving that child within, like you love your nieces. He deserves it, the same as they do.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by Tee.