Dear Peace,

Let me recap your history with your friend, to try to understand your situation better:

You were best friends, he was interested in you 2 years ago. He would flirt, talk and tease you, but “never asked for something official or even marriage”, so you assumed he is not interested in you romantically. However, when you got involved with someone else, he then “told me how much he likes me and wants to marry and he is waiting for me and that I should let him know when it doesn’t work out“.

When that relationship didn’t work out, you let your friend know and he started flirting with you again, but again, nothing serious:

Unfortunately The relationship dint work out. Than again this flirting went on ,teasing,talking all but nothing serious..

Then you got involved in another relationship, because you were “tired of waiting for something serious from that ”best friend”:

untill after months I got confused and someone asked me out in Germany..he was looking decent and of same culture.. i Started seeing him ,because I was tired of  waiting for something serious from that“ best friend“ ..

Now I think I understand better what happened here: you liked your best friend, had feelings for him, and were hoping for quite a while that he would finally propose. But he never did, although at some point (when you were in another relationship) he told you he likes you a lot and wants to marry you and will be waiting for you. However, he never followed through on that, because when you were single again, he never proceeded to ask you to marry him.

And then, in the summer of 2021, you met your now husband. Your friend reacted in his usual manner: once you were in another relationship, he expressed that he is serious about you:

As I was a bit busy with my full time job and my new guy .I was not interested in flirting with my friend… so again he told me how serious he is …

Well, this friend of yours seems to be very problematic: he was only “serious” about you when you were in another relationship. But when you were available again, he never did anything to show that his intentions are serious. He never made a serious move and offered you marriage. Which means he was never serious about you, but was fooling with you. Playing a game. If he had serious intentions – and had he truly loved you – he would have made his move.

But since you had a crush on him and would have said yes if he had proposed – I wonder if you have doubts now? That maybe you should have waited with getting married, and waited for this guy to come to his senses? When you asked the question:

why is it so that sometimes we know that we took the right decision but suddenly we start to doubt ourselves and our Decisions ??

Was it the decision about dismissing this guy’s false promises once and for all, and choosing to settle with your now husband? Are you now doubting this decision?

For what it’s worth, I believe you made a good decision by choosing your husband, and stopped hoping that your friend would finally propose. If he is serious about you now, I think it’s only because he is under pressure to get married (his mother wants to make an official proposal to your family). But otherwise, he sounds like an immature and confused person, who only shows interest in you when you aren’t available. I think it’s a very good decision that you didn’t wait for him, because I don’t think your marriage would have been a happy one!