I must have saved a country in my past life to have received such good people in my life. I was always afraid of women in my life because of the bullying in primary school. But women have always been kinder to me than men. In every role. Except my brother. He is my best friend.

I felt angry too Anita, I felt really angry and it comes in between even now.

But It is true that people present their insecurities on us whenever such things happen and not the other way around.

Last year I told you all I made a mistake, the first and only in my life till now. It is a hollow feeling to kiss or be with someone for momentary comfort. And I was so distressed that I chose that. Only to realise later that I did not like it, I never want that. I was the one who lacked then, not anyone else. I was suffering gravely from insecurities, nobody else.

Similarly, he messing around and telling me he isn’t attracted to me says a lot about himself currently. He does not have a connect with his inner person, definitely trying to strangle that inner child. He was so unsure of himself that when surprisingly his bumble account filled with connects he felt he needed to explore them. Says a lot about how he felt in his native country and how this new country gave him that pseudo confidence.

I still get angry some nights for few moments, why did he pursue me then, he should have just moved on and done this. But no, he chose to hurt me purposely.

But that anger will do less harm to him and more harm to my mind.

I will start thinking of that lady, wanting to know about them, my insecurities will become high and I don’t want to thwart my growth because of anyone else.

But I feel so happy to see your messages… Both Tee and Anita for that matter… I truly feel I made friends on this forum.