Thank you a lot for your answer.

Maybe I am sexually attracted to both sexes.

but like I don’t want to experiment, maybe fantasize, but not like relationships and building family together.
even when I had sexual experiments with women while drunk it’s not like I thought about dating them, or have feelings.

but now I feel that maybe I lied to myself for my whole life!

and because I haven’t had relationships with men for almost 2 years, I’m just getting more and more confused and scared