Hi Ms. Anita,

I hope you are asleep and having a nice comforting feeling, I have found in the past few days if I go to bed with comforting thoughts I sleep better and do wake up with a smile when I realize life is & never will be perfect.  We all have good and bad days.  You will never be happy all the time, if your life is perfect all the time you won’t appreciate it as much if you don’t have bumps in the road to make you appreciate the blissfully happy days.

I had a turnaround today.  3 of my babies are not feeling well.  My Balinese 2-year-old is like a child and is such a unique little boy who fell down a pine tree & has a large wound on his head & I am nursing him.  My 10-year old which I have had since my Precious Mother passed & has always been attached to my hip has a Heart disease/FIV and a bad upper respiratory infection which he has had since he was a kitten.  He is such a sweet boy.  I had an ultrasound taken & found this out. about the Heart Disease.  I always pay close attention to him because with the heart diseases the vet said he could live a week or a few more years & there was no way of knowing so of course he is pampered.  His little sister has a fever and is feeling a bit puny & she is also on meds.  Last is the latest edition which walked in my door one day and jumped in my bed where Takeda was lying and went to sleep, she loves him and they get along so well so I have an appointment to have all of his shots and to have him neutered.

I decided not to see my friend tomorrow.  I called him and let him know I was going out of town tomorrow.  He asked when & I told him one day next week.  He told me he had a slot on Monday or Friday and that is when I had an awakening moment & thought this is crazy.  The type of life I would have with him is everything I don’t want and if we were together there would be the drama that would come from his clan.  I live a very drama-free quiet life.  I don’t want that.  Having to be put on a schedule. {LOL}~  INSANE~

He said he would bring my gifts by one day.  I have an enclosed area with tables & chairs in which he often leaves little things.on occasion. So he will set them in a chair.  I didn’t ask when or anything.  He knows I don’t open my doors for guests unless I have a heads-up.  I don’t like drop-ins and he is respectful of that. I don’t know what I am going to do with him.  Maybe it will just slow down and we can be like we were and text on occasion to say hi & ask no questions what we had was sweet but not the life I want.

I know in a few years if we were together I would get disgusted because he will always have the Drama Family to contend with.  Something like that can’t disappear.

Also, I realized I love music/reading and watching a good movie, and he does not like any of these.  All he thinks about is work and family and I am a deterrent to that Drama.  Hopefully, I will stand my ground.

Please smile in the morning, it is going to be a Beautiful day My Friend. Rain or Shine.  Both are wonderful, rain gives us a guilt-free reasons to be lazy and catnap/read or watch a good movie.  Sunny out I will work in the yard and chase my babies around.  I have a bubble machine on those days and my cats go nuts chasing them while I am running trying to catch them.  It is so adorable.

They all Love me unconditionally, why do I need a man that puts me on a schedule?

Something funny, my friend did tell me he hears the songs in his head and hums them when in his truck or in his bed before he goes to sleep and he laughed.  He said it made him feel good because if saw me while I would listen to my music. He also watched movies with me and seemed to enjoy them.  He buys me movies because he knows the type of movies I watch.

I am starting to feel bad for him because I feel he does not want to be living the life he is in and feels trapped.  He told me he wanted a happy life but taking care of so many people he couldn’t.

I am watching Frankie Valli & the four Seasons Concert & bed full of fur babies and will fall asleep around 3 or 4~

Have a Beautiful night and “Smile” tomorrow.  Medicine for the soul!

Good Night my Friend.

Shookie~