Dear Addy:

I too do some of my better thinking while walking. “My relationship start with me giving good attention”- normal, so far. “I feel so much attracted, I do the extra caring, writing letters and poems, etc.“- normal. “When they finally start to get even closer with me, I just feel.. trapped.. more distant… fear to be committed“- this is common and it is a problem, being that it is a pattern. I can relate. From my experience what it is about (and I will get straight to the core of it) is this: as a child, you grow up trapped with a problematic parent, a parent who you felt close to (at least in the beginning) => as an adult, you feel trapped and distressed once a romantic interest reciprocates your closeness (making the closeness a 2-way thing, and therefore, real).

“What should I do about that?“- start with letting the boy in the photo (other thread) tell you about his experience of growing up trapped. You can type his words here, if you want).

anita