(* Dear Anita, thank you a lot, I am feeling much better today. The fever is gone, and now it seems like a regular cold.)

Dear Addy,

But as of now I’m thinking like being fake like that takes an effort too. And I don’t think I’m that much effortful my relationships or with other people

I prefer authenticity that’s what I know
Because When I broke up with my 1st gf (Not LDR) Just because she was trying to fit in with me. I knew she’s doing these things and showing she’s enjoying (More or less) Hiking and Walking for hours at the beach..etc but I knew she’d prefer more if it’s indoor activities. And that’s what you can say not being authentic or faking?

Okay, so you’re saying that you broke up with your first girlfriend because she wasn’t being authentic with you and was faking that she likes the things you like, so that you would approve of her?

Let me ask you something: with your later two girlfriends, have you sometimes shared when you’re not in the best mood, or when you have doubts about yourself (such as what you’ve shared here on the forum: that you fear you’re not doing enough, not being successful enough, etc). Do you share those self-doubts with the person you’re involved with?