Dear Tee,
Hope you’re doing well

Good to hear! Did you have a situation in which you stopped yourself from using sarcasm and responded differently?

Yes. I did stop sarcasm in a harmful way. It’s been more than a week I think
I’ve watched both of the videos about the Empathy
Important thing I realized that it makes them think you’re on their side and it builds trust and how much important communication style is… And also think how would I feel?

And for anger
I found out that there is still some level of controlling behavior
Because of someone says No I can’t directly accept it. It really opened my eyes that it’s just my expatiations towards them. Also about making mistakes it’s the perfectionist inside of me that gets angry.
So it’s a signal and not a solution

I spent two hours on journaling this morning 😀

Yes, the child always blames themselves when the parent criticizes them. Later, when you got older, you saw that their behavior was wrong, but the child part of you still believed that he is the one to blame, that he’s not good enough. And now your inner critic (which are the internalized voices of your father and mother) is blaming your inner child. The same dynamic as when you were a child, only now the critic is within your own head, not outside.

Yes I agree. That’s why today while meditating I tried to connect my inner child. And it did felt good. I think not just today but like I’m already connected with my innerself/child more or less because that’s why I rarely feel alone and very comfortable spending time with myself

You can try it when you get upset about something and your first reaction is to beat yourself up for not being super calm and serene. You can tell yourself “it’s okay Addy that you feel angry, no wonder you feel angry, this was indeed hurtful what they did… ” And so you validate your own anger, instead of scolding yourself for it.

You can also get yourself a cute fluffy animal (a teddy bear or something that symbolizes your inner child) and hug that animal and talk to it, caress it… Maybe it will help you communicate better with your inner child if you have something physical, not just an image in your head.

I like how simply you guide with step by step. Maybe I’ll try that…
Although nowadays I did start spending time with my neighbor’s little kid. and oh boy It’s really fun. and funny enough I do feel kinda caring father towards him. I’m teaching him how to ride a bicycle and it did give me water in the corner of my eyes time to time.
So does that counts?

You will, just have a lot of patience with yourself. Small steps, baby steps… and lots of validation of your own feelings, rather than judging yourself for it.

Also, if you get frustrated with yourself for not healing faster, instead of criticizing and blaming yourself, have empathy for yourself, have patience, tell yourself it’s okay, you’re fine, you’re lovable, there’s nothing wrong with you… The key is self-acceptance, radical acceptance of all your feelings, allowing them to be…. without judging yourself for it.

The paradox is that the more accepting we are of our “faults” and “imperfections”, the faster we heal. That’s the power of self-compassion.

Well as in INFJ + Aries it’s not really easy but yeah I’m trying and I’m lot patient than before

I’ve read that combing traits are great a visionary leader, but it can also present some challenges. Like struggle with self-doubt and insecurity, and find it difficult to trust own instincts and abilities, also have difficulty setting boundaries and saying no to others, and may feel overwhelmed by the demands and expectations of others