Hi Eric

Thank you for explaining about your previous experiences of house trauma growing up. It definitely sounds like these worries are a trigger from an old wound.

Children can be very cruel. I’m sorry they did that to you. To a child big house = money.

But in reality it sounds like your family chose to invest in their business as opposed to their home. This is actually very smart because I’m sure they did it because they knew they would make a lot more money, more quickly if they invested in their business as opposed to an expensive large home which is a large expenditure and might not make as much money immediately.

I also think that whilst on one hand there’s trauma, on the other there are social and cultural concerns that you are very aware of.

That is why your plan with the gifts sounds like a good idea to me.

On the plus side, I’m sure that her parents are very aware of your financial capabilities, especially since your company just built their house. I’m sure that they will make her aware of the situation.

You never know, your parents may be considering building a house sooner than you think. Since you are dating they may be considering your future. Being married one day and raising children of your own. It might be worth having a discussion about it.