Dear p

I am so sorry that you have to live with such a dysfunctional family. Once you have finished college it will be easier to gain your freedom. There is a site called workaway there are lots of opportunities all over the world you basically work for 20-25 hours and they give you food & accommodation the placements are varied and could give you an idea of what you want to do & where you would like to live.

There maybe not a lot you can do about the way you are spoken to & treated at the moment, but you are in the driving seat when it comes to how you interact with other family members – which I know is much easier said than done  when you probably feel bombarded from all sides and the feelings that that must arise within.  I hope that you can find a support network near where you live such as a church or meditation group or volunteering opportunities. At some point you may benefit from some therapy sessions to help you process your childhood.