Dear Paradoxy,

Unfortunately we cannot work with just assumptions, I don’t want to take that chance.

It’s more than an assumption, but a very strong likelihood, if we take into consideration everything that happened and the type of person she is. It is actually common sense to assume that she slept with him, since they both had feelings for each other. And she’s not some prudent girl, but someone who believes that it’s okay to sleep with another man if she on that particular day is broken up with you.

Moreover, she conveniently lived in the same house with him, perhaps not in the fist week of your relationship, when the half-naked photo was taken (because you said she had a female housemate at that time?), but soon enough. Because in December he was already living there, and was angry and jealous of you when you came to her place. So that was an arrangement she was hiding from you. I have no doubt in my mind that her intention was to deceive you.

In a recent conversation she claimed that she found out where the money was coming from a day before the guy took her.

As I said, in recent conversations she was twisting the truth, making herself appear more “innocent” and less responsible for what happened. She was re-touching the story and changing the facts.

based on that, she knew her aunt’s plan, but she had apparently rejected that plan.

Well, she hasn’t rejected the plan.

Maybe stereotype number 1 did blind me. But a lot of guys told me it was normal, so I thought it was normal too.

Those guys obviously grew up with the same stereotype. In what part of the world do you live, if I may ask?

My father never said that women are inferior, he just said that women will be hard to deal with cause of their actions are based on emotions than logic, but they should still be treasured.

Well, if emotions are inferior and women base their decisions on emotions, it does make women’s decision making inferior, doesn’t it? And so, women are inferior too, at least when it comes to decision making about important things in life. The conclusion: women shouldn’t be trusted to make important decisions, right?

but they should still be treasured

How should they be treasured? If they fulfill their role of wife, housewife and mother? Cleaning, cooking, taking care of their husband’s needs, and… not having a say in important life decisions?

I will comment on B’s message a bit later. But what I notice is that she is presenting herself as the victim and minimizing her own bad behavior: her lying and deception regarding her ex, as well as her prostitution, as if those were minor things.

I never expected anything from you other than respect and faithfulness,

When a promiscuous girl like her tells you she wanted faithfulness…. and she started cheating from practically Day 1. It’s called hypocrisy. She is not seeing the log in her own eye, and then blaming you for your own.

In fact, your own “log” (the false belief about women) is what made you fall for her excuses, but it also made you look down on her and treat her with contempt (telling her she was stupid, a whore, etc). Your own log upheld this toxic relationship, and it did hurt her as well.

But her log is huge, and she isn’t willing to take responsibility for it, but is blaming you.