Dear Paradoxy,

I would like to address the examples of immoral women and rampant promiscuity that you’ve mentioned so far:

There is a girl here who is dating three men at the same time, and none of them know each other. Each man treats her well but as soon as one man leaves for work or something, she has the next man come over. And another thing is that she ensures that she does no service other than sex for the main bf. So far as to make sure that she cooked something for herself and ate it right before her bf came over. She has her man literally starving whenever he comes over or he brings food for her himself.

There was another girl, who was dating a rich chinese dude. Whenever he invited her to dinner or something, she would bring her real man claiming that he was just a friend or she would have him buy gifts for her, which she either kept for herself or gave to her real man. Eventually the chinese guy figured it out and he left but still, the audacity of the girl to cheat RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM is crazy.

The men here are no better either but I noticed that it is actually a cycle. Either a man or woman gets cheated on, and then they proceed to become a cheater in their next relationship and then whoever they cheated on becomes the next cheater and the cycle continues.

The amount of bad people is so overwhelmingly large, I cannot simply ignore the possibility of coming across them. I have come across too many women who wear revealing outfits to attract men’s attention and sleep with a bunch of them without the slightest respect for their own body, women with body counts in the double digits and I have come across too many women who thinks men should pay for everything and therefore take advantage of the men to pay their bills and etc.

I have also come across too many men who prefers to “enjoy their youth” sleeping around with multiple women EVEN WHEN their ideal woman is right in front of them. I have come across too many men who prefers “friends with benefits” instead of having a real relationship. There was even a guy who slept with SEVENTEEN women within his very first week in college just cause the women wanted to sleep with him.

What you have described is a very promiscuous culture, and so I looked up prostitution in the Caribbeans. And to my dismay, I have learned that the Caribbeans are amongst the top destinations for sex tourism, and that a lot of older men go there to have fun with young girls (and young boys), who are often only in their teenage years.

It seems that poverty there is widespread, and so prostitution became normalized, as a way to earn money. Which is how B’s aunt views prostitution – as a source of income – and perhaps even B was socialized into that mindset.

I’ve also learned about sex traffickers (some of them of Asian origin), who are organizing illegal immigration from Venezuela to Trinidad and Tobago. They promise young girls from Venezuela a job in a bar or a hair salon. But once they reach Trinidad and Tobago, their passports are taken and they are kept against their will, and used for prostitution. It is all enabled by corrupt police officers, so there is no way for it to be sanctioned.

After learning all that, I understood that prostitution is widespread in the Caribbeans, and it is a way for poor women to earn income. And that’s why you probably saw examples of women sleeping with multiple men, or having one “main” boyfriend, and other men on the side. Probably those other men are paying for sex. I know that in Thailand for example, married women are prostituting themselves (typically with tourists), and their husbands know about it and tolerate it, because that’s the source of income.

So it’s not that the women in the Caribbeans are promiscuous for fun. They are promiscuous because that’s the culture they are socialized into. Same as B was socialized into it, having her aunt as her role model and her “pimp”.

The aunt upholds the belief that men should be used to get rich and ensure a good life. And even this selfish attitude (the attitude of a gold digger) could be the logical reaction to the sad truth that women are used by men for sex. So a “smart” woman (in her view) would then turn this into her own advantage and “outsmart” the man, and at least get herself out of poverty.

I am not at all excusing this entire mindset, because it is toxic and humiliating. I am only trying to understand how come there are so many “wicked” and “immoral” women where you live.

I am curious what are your thoughts on this? I’ve made these observations based on a few internet articles, so I am not claiming anything, since I don’t know the real conditions there. But anyway, let me know your thoughts?