Dear Tee,

“What you have described is a very promiscuous culture, and so I looked up prostitution in the Caribbeans. And to my dismay, I have learned that the Caribbeans are amongst the top destinations for sex tourism, and that a lot of older men go there to have fun with young girls (and young boys), who are often only in their teenage years.” Not sure about that but I won’t be amazed if it is true. From what I have heard, men go to Asian countries in search for a wife, Caribbean and other similar countries in search for a fling, and modernized countries for gf/bf relationship. That is what I have heard.

“It seems that poverty there is widespread, and so prostitution became normalized, as a way to earn money. Which is how B’s aunt views prostitution – as a source of income – and perhaps even B was socialized into that mindset.” But a lot of third world countries have a lot of poverty though, so what exactly would drive prostitution to rise to such a large level?

“It is all enabled by corrupt police officers, so there is no way for it to be sanctioned.” Coincidentally, the girl who has 3 different boyfriends is actually working as a cop…

“After learning all that, I understood that prostitution is widespread in the Caribbeans, and it is a way for poor women to earn income. And that’s why you probably saw examples of women sleeping with multiple men, or having one “main” boyfriend, and other men on the side.” I am not too sure if prostitution can be compared to cheating…. cause they still keep them around like partners instead of leaving it as a fling after they get what they want. As far as I know, the women are actually maintaining a relationship with them, not just money.

“So it’s not that the women in the Caribbeans are promiscuous for fun. They are promiscuous because that’s the culture they are socialized into. Same as B was socialized into it, having her aunt as her role model and her “pimp”.” Not going to lie, but I am having a hard time believing that prostitution is part of the culture….

“The aunt upholds the belief that men should be used to get rich and ensure a good life.” The last thing I heard about her is that she is getting baptized and changing her life etc but I don’t believe it and I don’t plan to forgive her for what she did. Maybe God will, but I can’t.

“And even this selfish attitude (the attitude of a gold digger) could be the logical reaction to the sad truth that women are used by men for sex” Yeah I am pretty sure men just decided that it is better to use women for sex by giving them money instead of being used by women and have their money taken from them.

“So a “smart” woman (in her view) would then turn this into her own advantage and “outsmart” the man, and at least get herself out of poverty.” Exactly, which is why I said this is a cycle: One person gets used, and they decide to use others so they won’t get used themself, then the others who get used decide to do the same thing because they also don’t want to be used again. It is just a continuous cycle of hurt.

“I am curious what are your thoughts on this? I’ve made these observations based on a few internet articles, so I am not claiming anything, since I don’t know the real conditions there. But anyway, let me know your thoughts?” I find it very difficult to believe that prostitution is part of their culture, cause all this gold digging and etc I learned from the American culture, while my parents learned about it from Black culture. But I guess everyone has different reasons/motivations to doing all these immoral activities. I also noticed that a lot of black families are single parented, so growing up in that kind of household could play a factor, idk. But even then, most people are aware of morality. Even B. She grew up surrounded by these immoral activities but she said that these activities were disgusting to her and she will never follow that path. But like I said, she had COUNTLESS opportunities to use men for money and etc, but she didn’t. She is extremely beautiful and a lot of men are attracted to her, to the point of even blackmailing her job if she doesn’t sleep with him, but she still didn’t do it. So she is aware of these morals. She knows it is wrong, and it doesn’t seem like she wanted to take advantage of others. But idk, maybe I am just making up excuses for her. But based on all the time that I spent with her, I think she just lacked good parenting where her parents didn’t advice her well enough.

I even talked to my cousin last night and she is 17 and even she has a poor understanding of society and life etc. She doesn’t even know why stealing is wrong. She just knows that stealing is wrong, but not why it is wrong. And I am confused as to how this kind of mindset even came around. What made them stop questioning things? What made them stop trying to understand? What made them think like robots, never wondering why certain things are wrong and why certain things are bad?

Paradoxy