Excellent advice, Chad. I needed to read this right now.
And April, I too grew up with major criticism and rejection from my family. I’m 37 and still suffer from the insecurities that being rejected has created. For most of my life I hid from myself in relationships. I was never happy in relationships, either, because I was still not accepting myself. It’s major hard work to get through it, but keep trying, keep working. Even if it takes a life time, it’s worth it if for a few seconds of your day to see yourself as you truly are, without the labels and perceived flaws.
When I was more determined and working hard to eliminate the awful thoughts, I was practicing focusing on the good. If it’s not good and full of life’s true beauty, I took my focus away from it. After a few days of practicing focusing on the pretty flower, the kind person, the one thing you might love about yourself, it will get easier, and easier… Check out the book/audiobook ‘Hardwiring Happiness’. It’s a neurological perspective on happiness and acceptance and really helped me to see why I have the patterns I do.
When I stop hating myself and procrastinating with practicing focusing on the good, like I’ve been doing for the past month, I’ll get back to my place of contentment and self-acceptance. I’ve been lazy and now I’m suffering for it. For some reason, after working hard and seeing results, I get into a space where I think it shouldn’t be such hard work and happiness and self-acceptance should just come naturally, but it doesn’t. It takes mindfulness and hardwork to re-wire the brain! But I still encourage others who suffer as I do to try it! Meditation and practice.
Sending love and acceptance to you and hope you can find your peace and beauty to love and accept yourself!
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 