Shame is a tough one, and it hurts like hell. I don’t think you really want to give up on being a good person though. I don’t see how it would reduce your shame in any case.

I agree with Kath, in both of these examples “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there/you didn’t seem to hear me,” is a possible response. The people in your examples were grumpy/rude, but the pain you feel at being “publicly shamed” doesn’t come from them. It comes from something in you. When somebody gives you shit, you don’t have to take it. It’s their shit.

Rather than planning your transformation into a callous, uncaring supervillain, consider what it is in you that needs other people to always be polite and considerate to you, or that needs to be recognised for the hard effort you put into being a “good person”. Shame is the downside of pride. If you’re collapsing under the weight of your shame, look at the size of your pride.

I recognise this is probably not the solution you were looking for. On the upside, if the source of your pain is within you, there’s something you can do about it. If the source is everybody else, you’re stuffed. They’re not gonna change.

I hope my contribution is of some use. The other two responses are also good, and may be more to your liking. In any event, I hope your pain and shame will subside over time, and that you will truly feel the benefits of your kindness every day.

All good things to you.