Hi With Feathers

I can hear how meaningful this relationship has been for you and how much it hurts to realise it is drawing to a close. ❤️

These things are difficult and painful, but you will always have your memories together. The way that she touched your heart will stay with you.

It is hard that she is moving on, but happiness is what we all want for our loved ones.

You deserve happiness too. It might not be with her, but you should find it for yourself. ❤️

Dear With Feathers:

I hear your pain. The idea of moving forward without her probably feels impossible right now, and that’s completely understandable. You are grieving not only the loss of her presence but also the future you imagined together.

How do you recover from this?

* Let yourself grieve: Losing her is a real loss, and you have every right to mourn the relationship. Cry if you need to. Journal your emotions. Allow yourself space to feel everything.

* Cut ties (if possible): Right now, staying in contact with her may only prolong the pain.

* Reclaim your identity: You said she is part of every aspect of your life. But you existed before her, and you will exist beyond this. Start finding small ways to engage in life without the shadow of her presence.

* Shift your perspective: Right now, the pain is overwhelming, but in time, you will see that this breakup is creating space for something better—whether that’s personal growth, new love, or a deeper understanding of yourself.

* Build support: You do not have to go through this alone. Surround yourself with friends, family, or even a therapist who can help guide you through the healing process.

Right now, your only job is to heal. And little by little, moment by moment—you will.

Sending you strength and kindness.

anita

How are you, With Feathers 🪶🕊️

Dear With Feathers,

I’m really glad you reached out. I’ll take the time to read and reply when I can—likely in a day or two. In the meantime, please take good care of yourself.

Anita

Dear With Feathers:

I’m really sorry you’re going through this—it sounds incredibly painful, and I can hear how much this betrayal has shaken you. Seven years is a long time, and to have it end with dishonesty and disrespect only makes the hurt deeper. It’s completely understandable that you’re feeling sad, angry, and lost right now.

One of the hardest parts of a breakup like this is coming to terms with the fact that the person you loved wasn’t who you thought they were. 😔

Recovery won’t be immediate, but it is possible. The pain feels ingrained now, but that doesn’t mean it will always feel this heavy. Healing starts with allowing yourself to grieve—not just the relationship, but the future you imagined, the trust that was broken, and the sense of security that was lost.

As for opening up again, it’s okay not to be ready yet. Trust doesn’t rebuild overnight. But this experience doesn’t define your ability to love or be loved in the future. You are more than this pain, and more than what she failed to give you. When you’re ready, love will feel different, safer, and right.

For now, take it one step at a time. Lean on people who support you, honor the emotions as they come, and remember—you deserve clarity, respect, and love that doesn’t make you question your worth.

I’m here if you ever want to talk more. 💙🌿

Anita

Dear With Feathers:

You are very welcome. One thing that might help is expressing what you’re feeling in some form—writing, art, music, or even movement. Sometimes, emotions feel chaotic and overwhelming when they stay inside, but when you externalize those feelings through writing, art, music, or movement, it can be like opening a window in a stuffy room—giving them space to breathe, shift, and settle.

Writing helps put abstract emotions into words, even if the sentences feel raw or unpolished. Journaling, poetry, or even unsent letters to the person you’re grieving can bring clarity. Just the act of translating emotions into language can make them less overwhelming.

Art is another way to process feelings that words can’t always capture. Sketching, painting, or crafting something symbolic of your experience allows you to express grief visually, letting your emotions take shape outside of yourself.

Music—whether creating, singing, or just listening deeply—can provide an emotional release. Sometimes a single song can express what words never could, and engaging with music can help untangle complicated feelings.

Movement—whether dancing, exercising, or simply taking long walks—helps process emotions physically. Grief often gets trapped in the body, and moving can release some of that heaviness.

The key isn’t to perfect the expression but to allow yourself to feel through it, and it’s not about making something that will impress others —it’s about making something true to what you’re feeling.

Even small acts of expression can help lighten the emotional load over time.

Would any of these resonate with you? Personally, I find writing in the forums to be really healing—I do a lot of it in my own threads. If it feels right for you, you’re always welcome to do the same.

Anita