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  • #430699
    Laven
    Participant

    It’s been about 3 weeks of non communication between neighbor guy and I and I still feel horrible and miss him. I still love him.

    I don’t know how to move on or if I ever can. . Some people are unable to move on no matter the length of time.

    It doesn’t help that we live in close proximity to one another and today was another day that I witnessed another woman in his place of residence.  She had sleep attire on, and I am certain that I saw him and her kiss and spoon.

    I guess all he ever told me in regards to us being and building a life together was a lie. I really wish that he had meant everything he told me.

    I was hoping that he was a good guy and finally the one who wouldn’t use and hurt me like the rest..but he did.

     

    I guess I was used Yet again for someone’s ego boost. My past relationships have all been the same..

     

    Someone with very little self confidence and esteem,  sweeping me off my feet and giving me empty promises..only to ghost me.. and somehow very quickly gaining esteem getting into another relationship,  and quickly marrying that person.

    Like I am a practice person.

    I’m guess I’m the one who they practice “perfecting” their “game on”.

    Tremendously.

    I was probably right about him only fetishizing  me. His preference seems to be women who is of a certain descent …same as he.

     

    Is there a chance that he could have still meant everything he said to me and really was into me??

    Tbh, I often think about catching him coming home allegedly from work and talking to him. I honestly think about caving in all of the time.

     

    It’s extremely difficult to move on.

     

    #430706
    Helcat
    Participant

    Hi Laven

    I’m sorry to hear that your neighbour that you were dating recently ghosted you. How long were you dating for? I’m very sorry to hear that you’ve had other people treat you like this too.

    This guy has no class, not even bothering to break up with you. I’m sorry he lied to you about marriage. It’s heartbreaking stuff but honestly, says more than him than it does about you. He is a scumbag that uses people. It is honestly better to learn this now, than being married before finding it out.

    Dating is really difficult and there are lessons to learn here, protecting your heart is important. You didn’t protect yourself. There are basic rules that people follow to protect themselves in the event of a break up. Don’t date people in the workplace or neighbours.

    Some people, not all, from different cultures truly only consider people from their own culture as long term partners. Also, different cultures have different meanings around marriage. Some have informal marriages which are essentially spiritual unions that are essentially a blessing which gives you permission from God to have sex without it being a sin.

    Everyone has failed relationships, before they have successful ones. I hope that in the future you will be more guarded with your emotions and protect yourself. You do deserve protecting and if you don’t do it, no one else will do it for you.

    Wishing you all the best! ❤️🙏

    #430720
    Tommy
    Participant

    Hello Laven,

    Your post was mostly about how you feel. Very little description of things that happened or were done to you to make you feel this way. So, only can say that it is a sad story and sorry you feel that way. Please tell us when and how did he make promises to marry you or promise marriage? What were the plans? What caused them to go away? Just not call you the next day after sex? Something must have happened??

    Someone with little confidence sweeping you off your feet? That is a strange one. If little confidence then how did they sweep you off your feet? Practice person? I was always the sweet guy who wanted the nice girl who never wanted me. Never gave me a chance. Was looked down on .. as not being on their level. No confidence. So, how would I sweep a girl off their feet? Find a practice girl? I feel lucky that I met my wife and we got together. Never a practice girl.

    I am sorry. I am a man and do not understand. Sorry, I could not help. Wishing you the best.

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