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Caught feeling towards him during covid lock down, should I confront/confess?

HomeForumsRelationshipsCaught feeling towards him during covid lock down, should I confront/confess?

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  • #372030
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    I’ve been having insomnia for few days and couldn’t think of a way out, hoping to get a good advice from here.

    So during this covid-19 lock down period, I’ve been gotten very close with a hometown friend which we’ve been knowing each other for 5 years (We were normal friend all along until when covid happens). During this time, we are both in long distance and have been texting each other everyday for one year. We got intimate and share each other’s stories, sharing jokes and thoughts. The connection was deep and I slowly found that I’ve had feeling towards him.

    Due to the covid lockdown, we are currently both in different countries, we have not been seeing each other for one year, which I believe is what stopped our from progressing into something more. But we still maintain the daily interaction until now. And sometimes he likes to have this midnight talk which he shares about his lucid dream adventure, and these were the time when I felt most connected with him.

    Two weeks ago, he asked if I have dreamt of someone, and so I answered yes there have been few people who told me that (which in fact was happen during childhood time). And then he didn’t question much and move on with other topic. However, ever since that day I’ve notice the changes from his end. He started to stop investing emotionally, he never talk about his lucid dream anymore, and also I felt a distance between us whenever I tried to initiate a conversation with him. That just doesn’t feel right, I cant feel the closeness since then.

    After thinking through for the past two weeks, it felt like this could be stems from the last midnight talk we had, when I told him few people mention they dream of me, which he might misinterpret it as me texting with a few people at same time. But I’m not too sure if this is the case, and wonder how can I confront him regarding his recent change without appearing as needy? I’m also thinking if i should let him know my feeling towards him, but afraid that this would scare him off. What should i do?

    #372035
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Notebookb6:

    Welcome back, and Happy New Year to you!

    You shared that you’ve been having a long-distance relationship with a man for about a year. The two of you had midnight talks about his lucid dreams, and during those talks you felt very connected to him. At one point he asked you..

    1. I didn’t understand what he asked you. Can you restate clearly what he asked you?

    2. What kinds of lucid dreams, are you referring to- sexual lucid dreams?

    anita

    #372038
    Notebookb6
    Participant

    Dear Anita, happy new year to you too!

    To reply with your questions:

    1. We were discussing about whether if two person able to share the same dream, and he asked me if I have had someone appear in my dream before.

    2. No there is nothing sexual between us at all. The lucid dream he shared was about his adventure , things like exploring a haunted house or encountering forest spirit. 

    #372041
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Notebookb6:

    You asked: “how can I confront him regarding his recent change without appearing needy?”- send him a short and casual message saying that you miss your midnight talks and his lucid dreams, and ask him if he didn’t dream lately.

    “I’m also thinking if I should let him know my feelings towards him, but afraid that this would scare him off. What should I do?”- in what I suggested above, you would be telling  him that you miss the midnight talks you had- that’s telling him a bit about your feelings. It’s a beginning.

    anita

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