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This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Inky 2 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #211857

    Clarissa
    Participant

    how do I sit with this immeasurable pain. She is divorcing me. She wants to have our child who I have parented 100% with her. She wants to religate me to everother weekend. Shattered and lost.

    #211867

    Mark
    Participant

    Sorry for your pain Clarissa.

    I would get a good lawyer/solicitor and a therapist to help you through this transition.

    You need not shoulder this pain alone.  You will feel better once you know your options.

    Mark

    #211901

    Inky
    Participant

    Hi Clarissa,

    As a child of divorce, I can say with certainty that you will always have a relationship with your child.

    If you do only get him/her twice a month, you make sure that those are the best weekends on the planet! Trips, adventures, trips to the pet store, the city, sailing, rock climbing, the zoo, whatever! You would be the parent the child looks forward to, not the parent of the drudgery and the dam dailies. In a strange way, that's a gift.

    As for your spouse, I don't know her resolve and if she's already gotten a lawyer, but you haven't been served YET. Especially if the child is young you can entreat, beg and beseech her, to seek counseling with you, a couple's retreat, a remedy for whatever is the matter. “Then we can get a divorce, perhaps, when he/she is a little older”. By then the issues could be worked out, who knows.

    You hang in there. Take care of yourself. And get great at compartmentalizing things.

    Best,

    Inky

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