Hello Donald:

When a parent depends heavily on their adult child for emotional support, the first step in establishing healthy boundaries is recognizing that you are not responsible for regulating your parent’s feelings. It’s not your job.

Boundaries become possible when they are framed not as Confrontation but as Clarity, and when they’re about your limits, not their approval.

It’s also important to build alternative sources of support — for the parent and for yourself — so the emotional load doesn’t fall on one relationship.

And finally, boundaries work best when they are consistent: not harsh, not punitive, just the same message delivered calmly over time, even if the parent pushes back.

Anita