Carly,

I’m sorry for the difficulty you’re experiencing, and know how uncomfortable it can feel when we rise and fall quickly from joy to tastelessness. Buddha taught that we have a fundemtnal ignorance of how to find joy and balance, and rely on our parents and teachers for instructions on how to dance with the world. Unfortunately, they had to rely on their parents and teachers as well, so on and on our present moments rest on the same rising and falling of our ancestors. However, we can gently take the reigns and take a stand, make changes, and learn a better strategy. With this intent, a few things came to heart as I read your words.

The first is that with the flux happening so quickly, day by day, perhaps checking with your doctor about possible imbalances might be helpful if you haven’t already. Food allergies, not enough of certain vitamins, and various other causes could contribute to the wildness of the swings. If you have a distaste for doctors, perhaps consider looking for a doctor who specializes in homeopathy… they often pick up on things that might be overlooked. (One friend of mine had something similar, and a single supplement of sepia levelled her out). There a lot of people that deserve your trust, and its fine to make them earn it, but at least give them a chance!

If you’ve done that already, or want some practices that could help, consider taking up a metta practice. We often think we’re victims of our emotions, like they control us. They sort of do, but we have a lot more control than we often think. Said differently, we have the ability to intentionally grow emotional states. When we work with metta (search YouTube for “metta guided meditation” if interested) we are actually growing our happiness. They’re like mental images we hold that produce the conditions of warmth within us, and it really makes a world of difference. Especially for you, because of your strong empathy, it will help you remain nourished… so others won’t have to try (and then fail) to help. Instead, your heart can grow strong and peaceful.

Finally, it makes sense why it is difficult to confide in people. People are weird. They flip from hot to cold, smile fake smiles sometimes, and are full of twists and tangles. When someone with a strong empathy is unsettled, relating to people can be disorienting. Much like when we are thirsty we will drink salt water even though it is bad for us, a thirsty empath grasps at others energy and suffers alongside them. Instead, we can keep their energy on their side, and ours on our side. Metta will help a lot with that, because it makes our body smooth and peaceful. Said differently, if you can drink in happiness directly from a metta practice, you won’t be thirsty as you dance with those around you and therefore unintentionally drinking in their salty water.

With warmth,
Matt

Hi,

I can related to you and would like to tell you that you are not the only one feeling like that.. Just think of it as a passing phase which will pass by soon and start imagining the next happy satisifed phase of ur life… I know its easier said than done and sometime u need meds to get out of such a state and overwhelming and unconditional support from someone close who tells u it is ok to feel like this for a short while..

Believe that you are perfect as GOD makes everything perfect though our eyes may not view them as so.

Love
Mom22