Needing some insight, which I have seem to have lost…
I recently lost my job of 6.5years. There were many things I enjoyed about my job, but for the last two years I was there, I knew I was becoming increasingly unhappy. I was moved around so much within the company that I was no longer given an actual title to my job nor any sort of solid hours (working early, then late, then early the next day, then to a different office..) I felt unappreciated. And I felt unnoticed. I had spoken with my office manager about this and she had acknowledged my unhappiness and had assured me things would be better later. Well, later arrived, and I found myself being let go from the company. They had told be that it was because they could see I was unhappy. It was true, but I was assured things were going to change and it would be better. Mind you, I was searching and looking for other options for another position elsewhere. The moral of the office I was in was not great, and the change I was promised was not happening. I sometimes feel that if I had been given a solid position in the office and also made to feel appreciated, I would have been happy. At the same time though, I have come to ask myself: was it really what I was meant to do? Would me finding another job in the same industry really make a difference? What do I really want to do now? Will it bring me the appreciation and bring me more money? (which was another reason I was checking out other options..) before I started looking for other work, I had started to put together my business idea that I wanted to do for a very long time. I was excited because it was giving me a chance to realize my dream. I just started working on it, and then I had to leave my ‘actual’ job. Now when I’m thinking about my business that I just started to put together, I have such uncertainty. I feel like it is hopeless now. And I feel like it is so silly. And before I was so excited and confident. I’m confused as to if this has to do with how I’ve lost my somewhat reliable job (familiar, is maybe a better way to put it) and it has made me depressed somewhat, even though, I know that this could be the very blessing I need. Also, I’ve applied to SO many jobs and I’ve had a few interviews but not many. So, as odd as it sounds, is my path supposed to be my dream, or is it something else? I have an interview with a company tomorrow and I feel repelled by it. I don’t want to be subservient to anyone anymore..but am I blowing my chance at making money while my business is in the works? Or do I follow my heart about my business and just go for it and be my own boss/create my own path? I just notice that when I’m looking for a new job that would make me a lot of money or happy, either I don’t hear back or another obstacle appears. I do need some reassurance financially, and either I just start paying attention to myself and what I truly want, or I find something that I like and will for sure bring some money in right now while I work on my business. If anyone has some wise insight, I’d love to hear (read) what you know!