Home→Forums→Tough Times→Feelings for co worker?
- This topic has 79 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 34 minutes ago by
anita.
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October 19, 2025 at 9:14 pm #451069
meParticipantYeah 3 hrs away. I’m busy working and can’t take time off even if I wanted. Plus other matters I have to attend to. Now if I had 2 weeks off? I’m there.
October 19, 2025 at 9:23 pm #451070
anitaParticipantI wish you could have taken some time off, just to see her. The little-big things in life, things that matter.
October 19, 2025 at 9:35 pm #451071meParticipantMe too. Anyway it ended after the 4 hrs post, not been online since. Basically she’s like Ohhhhh yeahhhh!!! Come to Taiwan for a month!!!! And how she’s exploring new places and things but she feels lonely sometimes, which I said don’t feel lonely, I’m here if you want to talk with or travel with to Taiwan/here.
October 20, 2025 at 1:19 am #451072
TeeParticipantDear me,
sorry for just popping up in your thread. I haven’t read all of it, but did get the general idea about a certain insecurity in you regarding this girl, which Roberta and Anita aptly identified as the push-pull dynamic.
There’re probably deeper reasons for this, but I don’t intend to go into that but just share something I’ve read today about a celebrity couple (whom to be honest I don’t know much about, but liked their love story anyway): so it’s about singer Dua Lipa and actor Callum Turner.
They both travel a lot for work and have very little time to meet, but still, they meet whenever they can, even if it’s only for 2 days. They have a saying “Making the trip to see one another is never not worth it.”
He said:
“If you can go for two days, just f*ing go. And if you’re tired, it doesn’t matter because you’re going to have a nice time and have a nice memory”.
And she said about their relationship:
“That vulnerability is so scary, but I feel so lucky to get to feel it…. I’ve spent a lot of time being guarded or protecting my heart, and so I’m letting go of that feeling and just being like, ‘Okay, if I’m supposed to get hurt, then this is what’s going to happen.’ I have to just allow love”.
When I saw that you’re only 3 hours away from this girl, I thought to myself that it would be such a pity if it ended like that: basically she complaining that she feels lonely, and you never visiting, finding excuses, and yet wanting to visit.. arrghhh 🙂
Anyway, this is my 2 cents. I love myself a good love story 🙂 I think it would be awesome if you actually gave it a chance…
October 20, 2025 at 9:23 am #451086anitaParticipantDear me:
Excellent post by Tee. What the celebrity said about her vulnerability, being guarded and protecting her heart (“That vulnerability is so scary… I’ve spent a lot of time being guarded or protecting my heart”) fits you very much, I think.
Let’s look at the last post you submitted last night: “Basically she’s like Ohhhhh yeahhhh!!! Come to Taiwan for a month!!!! And how she’s exploring new places and things but she feels lonely sometimes, which I said don’t feel lonely, I’m here if you want to talk with or travel with to Taiwan/here.”-
When she told you that she feels lonely sometimes, she was honest and vulnerable. When she went: “Ohhhhh yeahhhh!!! Come to Taiwan for a month!!!!”, she was so excited and hopeful to be together with you again!
How did you reply to her?
“I said don’t feel lonely,”- that’s the push. It’s cold. It sounds (to me) like you are telling her: You miss me/ you need me, but I don’t miss or need you.
Continued quote: “I’m here if you want to talk with or travel with to Taiwan/here.”- that’s the pull: I don’t miss you (the push), but I’ll talk to you anyway (the pull)
While you are trying to protect your heart, to avoid vulnerability.. you are hurting her feelings 😔, don’t you think, me?
Back to the quote by the celebrity: “and so, I’m letting go of that feeling and just being like, ‘Okay, if I’m supposed to get hurt, then this is what’s going to happen.’ I have to just allow love”-
To let go of the fear of getting hurt and to allow love. 🫶💗🤲 💞
What do you think, me?
Anita
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