Naming the problem is a good first step. However often we wish to fix something and that’s as far as it goes.

Do you want to do the work to address your shyness? Be honest with yourself. Romantic relationship as the Buddha noted opens the door to chaos… of course chaos opens the door to wonders.

“All the most powerful emotions come from chaos -fear,anger,love- especially love.” ― Kirsten Miller

“You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.”  ― Friedrich Nietzsche

“Our real discoveries come from chaos, from going to the place that looks wrong and stupid and foolish.” ― Chuck Palahniuk

I don’t see the epilepsy as a problem, you have learned to deal with it and anyone who you give a chance to know you will see that. The shyness on the other hand is a problem. As a shy person my self I was surprised to learn that others experience my shyness as arrogance. To protect ourselves we have learned to accommodate our shyness but from a observer lit can look like arrogance

– You don’t start conversations because you’re scared of being rejected. But some people confuse this with being unfriendly.
– You feel extremely self-conscious so you spend a lot of time and energy on your appearance. But other people confuse this with being vain.
– You can’t look someone in the eye because you’re too shy. But some people confuse this as a lack of interest.
– You give short responses because you’re anxious. But some people confuse this with thinking they are “not worthy” of your time.
-nYou adopt a defensive or “stay away” body language because you feel self-conscious. But other people confuse this with rudeness.

You can see how quickly things can go array for the shy… most of who would use such experience to reinforce their shyness. better to remain alone (how many times have you told yourself that?) I recommend finding a life coach or therapist to help overcoming you shyness and practice techniques with.

Overcoming Shyness: How to Feel More Confident

• This reply was modified 6 years, 10 months ago by Peter.

Dear Chris Guiterrez:

Interesting: I have/ had two uncles and three aunts. Of the five one uncle had epilepsy. None of his five siblings had epilepsy. Of the six siblings, it seems like he was the only one that had a good marriage, not from the beginning perhaps but seems like it turned out good. He has children all adults now, and as far as I know his children are doing better than the children of his siblings.

I had a cousin who had epilepsy. I saw her that one time that I remember, having an epileptic attack I remember. Remembering it, I wish I could have done something for her, help her. Not just when she was having the episode but in between those.

A girlfriend, a decent girlfriend, would care to help  you, to be good to you as you are good to her, having empathy for you, not scorn, not dislike. But empathy, wanting to make your life better.

anita

You are welcome, Chris Gutierrez.

anita