- This topic has 10 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 9 months ago by Anonymous.
December 17, 2014 at 3:28 am #69389AnonymousInactive
I’ve posted on this site’s forum several times now, but I feel this issue needs to take more of my focus, as it seems to be the reoccurring thing that makes me depressed and stuck.
I’m 24 now. At the age of 15, I took an acne medication called Accutane.
Perhaps you’ve heard of it. It’s pretty harsh for many people who take it, and years on I feel it’s left my body broken.
My main issues are headaches (migraines), feeling nauseous and having a poor appetite (more recent), chronic fatigue and mental issues like mood swings, depression and anxiety.
There are a lot of things I’m unable to get away with doing, like drinking alcohol or caffeine so I restrict those things.
My social life is basically non-existent.
I quit my job just over 2 weeks ago, because I was too depressed to carry on.
(However, my money won’t last long and life doesn’t stop to give a guy a break, so I’ll end up in another crappy job soon).
I try to stay positive but it can be really hard to stop imagining how my life could have been, or how it ‘should’ be.
People say your twenties are the best years of your life, but my 20’s have so far been spent struggling and ‘trying’ to enjoy life.
I’ve certainly tried a lot of things – Chinese medicine, health supplements (Have spent thousands), speaking to medical doctors (tests come up clear and so the doctors think everything is okay and that I’m a hypochondriac), going to nutritionists (confirms gut problems and adrenal fatigue), speaking to therapists, adjusting diet, reading self-help books. I mean, honestly, if someone has tried to get better… it’s this guy.
And I can’t explain just how frustrating it is to put in all the effort and get NO results.
None at all. I mean, how am I supposed to NOT feel sorry for myself on occasion?
I know my issues are physical, because there are many signs that something is amiss.
My body temperature is always low, I get headaches frequently (not just when stress arises, which is often due to everything going on), the fatigue could not possibly be imaginary.
I just feel like I go back and forth between so many ideas.
Maybe it’s my thyroid, adrenals, gut, mind, stress, diet… etc.
Maybe it’s time for me to accept that I’m going to have this for the rest of my life.
How do I accept something like that?
How do I accept that I can barely work? And that this all happened because I was deceived by a drug company that only cares about profits, and does everything it can to hide the truth about the risks of their medication (This drug was originally used as chemotherapy, but they don’t tell people with acne that).
I get so down on myself because my life just seems to be going nowhere and I don’t know what to do anymore.
If anyone has any experience with chronic illness and something like Chronic Fatigue, I’d be interested to hear your advice.
I can’t help but think there has to be a way out of this.
If there isn’t, my life doesn’t seem worth living.
The anxiety and everything else are horrific.
Please help.December 17, 2014 at 6:58 pm #69435JennieParticipant
I have lupus which is also a chronic illness for over 16 years. I was diagnosed when I was 18. The doctor told me not to bother with college because it would be a waste of money because I only had a life expect of 4 years (I did not listen and got my degree.) I also was told I could not have children ( I have 2 boys now.) The thing that helped me was educating myself with my illness (you can read just like the doctors read-they just have a piece of paper and spent a lot of money) , perseverance and trying new options. Yes, I also spent thousands of dollars on herbs, new age crazy antics but the key was trying something different finding hope in them. Yes, not all of them work but they worked on my spirit.
Recently I have been diagnosed with pneumonia and pleurisy, which has been a huge set back. I had a bit of a pity party last night but I dusted my self off this morning and got on the phone with the doctor’s offices,dedicated myself to annoy them until they help me. There is a way out of this but you have to start with your perception of the situation. Call on the people you know especially if they have a background that you could benefit from for advice. For example, my mother and my best friend are nurses. I check with them on medications and what they think. Don’t let the situation define who you are. -SouthernspiritDecember 18, 2014 at 2:41 am #69441AnonymousInactive
Thank you for your reply.
I go back and forth between what I think I have.
Realistically, I have pretty severe adrenal fatigue and need to continue to work on the mental and emotional side of things.
It’s easy to get obsessed with diet and start eliminating things like dairy and gluten, or introducing green smoothies, but if you’re stressed out and looking at things negatively, that good food isn’t going to do a whole lot.
Wishing you well in your recovery.
xDecember 19, 2014 at 10:49 am #69514CarolParticipant
HI Dude, I was compelled to write, if only to offer you an introduction to a few light workers who you may not be aware of. Both offer help without a lot of money. Teal Swan is an intuitive who has copious amounts of wisdom to share through utube and her blog and she offers many workshops for nominal fees- some are on a donation system. I just read her interesting article about liver congestion being the root of many dis-ease including chronic fatigue. http://tealswan.com/articles/liver-congestion-a-growing-epidemic
Next i strongly encourage you to look into the work of Donna Eden, another healer who had horrible body issues as a young child but was able to heal herself through energy medicine, a term she coined. She wrote a book, Energy Medicine and she also has utube videos to help you strengthen you energy system https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vr-FEoY440g Don’t give up, you have an opportunity to heal yourself and offer your experience to those who you meet along your journey.
I send yo healing energy and love, CarolDecember 19, 2014 at 4:10 pm #69527SnailsParticipant
Have you tried getting away from everything for a short time (more than 3-4 nights) , to see if it’s something in your environment that your body can’t tolerate anymore since the acne medication?
Maybe try a camping trip with a friend in a well used tent (or buy a cheap second hand tent – so not so much off-gassing). Maybe try to find somewhere that’s isolated (but safe to camp) with very bad mobile coverage (keep the phone off for emergencies only and if there’s other campers around set the tent as far away as possible), no tv or radio towers. Eat only healthy whole foods, ditch the deodorant and body products. I don’t want to over do it but some people, who’s body is now so run down can’t even take smoke so… if you have a camp fire keep upwind or use a small gas fire to cook. If you feel better from the trip it might help to see if it’s something that you’re body can’t take? I had a huge list of health problems and did the above..it helped me. Just like to point out it may not help with your condition, but at least it could be helpful in ruling out something that your exposed to, something environmental and hay you get a nice camping trip from it at least 🙂
All the best to you
December 19, 2014 at 4:32 pm #69533AnonymousInactive
- This reply was modified 6 years, 9 months ago by Snails.
Thank you both for the replies.
Godisu – I’ve heard of Donna Eden and am aware of her book. After many failed attempts with such things as the law of attraction, EFT and The Healing Code, I’m not sure I’m willing to risk wasting my time again on something related to energy medicine. Has it helped you in some way? I watched some of Donna’s YouTube videos a while back… I just remember thinking ‘Hmmm. Not sure about this’.
Both of you – It’s tricky for me now. I’ve been so obsessed with diet and health for a long time and don’t want to fall into worrying about all of that all the time, again. Like… gluten, dairy, etc. There are so many possibilities for what may be causing the illness. Clearly Accutane triggered something bad. I have been away from my home on holiday before – like 10 days abroad. My problems remained just as bad.
Lately, I’ve noticed a few more niggling problems. My chest gets really itchy and there’s no way in hell I can grow a beard. After 4-5 days of not shaving, my neck itches an insane amount. I just don’t really know where to begin. Obviously, diet plays a bit part but nobody can definitively say what’s healthy and what isn’t – i.e. paleo/vegan/vegetarian.
It’s an ongoing struggle for me to determine if my issues are mainly physical or mental/emotional, i.e. stress.December 23, 2014 at 6:38 am #69709Wayne GearingParticipant
I am going to go out on a limb here and say, I believe the real underlying issue is stress caused by years of frustration. I mention this because, whenever I am under a load of stress.. I get real physical issues like headaches, a low body temperature and various other factors. Have you ever thought about taking a sport up to relieve the stress? Meditation also may or may not work. Now you mention that you get itchy skin, what grooming products are you using? Sometimes, we can develop a sensitivity to certain ingredients and not realise it.December 23, 2014 at 6:45 am #69711AnonymousInactive
Hey WLG2808, if that is your real name…
Cheers for the reply first of all.
No doubt stress is a major influence in the problems I am dealing with.
I dabble in meditation and relaxation – like listening to pod-casts in bed. Walks in nature always help me feel a bit better and get some distance from whatever is bothering me.
I struggle to do any heavy exercise because I get so light-headed, dizzy and feel like I’ve been run over.
Stuff like yoga and walking are what I’m best with at the moment.
I don’t think any of my skin products are an issue. They are marked hypoallergenic. I don’t use that crap that comes in a can to shave with.
My beard hair seems to just grow in poor condition. Not to over-analyse, but it’s so wiry after a few days that I don’t think it’s ‘normal’. It’s possible that Accutane did something to permanently adjust the way my hair grows.
I guess I just have to shave every few days for now and accept that I can’t grow a nice, soft beard.
I assume it’s all related and that once my body is in a better state, my hair will not be in such poor condition.
Everything is linked.December 23, 2014 at 5:13 pm #69738TiffinyParticipant
After reading your post, it sounds very familiar to me. I’ve been suffering for many years with dizziness/fainting/falling, shortness of breath, body/joint pain, digestive issues, “off” body temperatures, headaches/migraines, the list goes on & on. About a year ago, after a 2nd admission to the hospital in less than a year for cardiac episodes, my dr. told me of a condition called Dysautonomia (Dis-auto-NO-mia), a dysfunction of the autonomic (think, automatic) nervous system. It affects everything in your body that you do NOT consciously think about, including digestion, heart rate, blood volume, blood pressure, temperature control, etc. There are many different types of Dysautonomia & treatment is available. Both holistic AND pharmacological. I’m am just beginning on my journey to the “real” me, in finding a proper diagnosis, change my living situation drastically, and will hopefully be able to get off most, if not all, medications. I am NOT a medical professional!!! Just a patient who has been through the ringer & then some for 26 years! I’m not saying you DO have that (in fact, I pray you do not), but it is definitely worth looking into, if for no other reason then to find some peace & answers. I would be happy to provide you with any information of where to look if you are interested. God bless you & good luck on your journey!
TiffinyDecember 23, 2014 at 6:14 pm #69739AdamParticipant
I want to address the comment you made, “I try to stay positive but it can be really hard to stop imagining how my life could have been, or how it ‘should’ be. People say your twenties are the best years of your life, but my 20′s have so far been spent struggling and ‘trying’ to enjoy life.” First, you need to eliminate the word try from your vocabulary. Try is an illusion. You’re either doing it or you’re not. There’s no in-between. Secondly, everyone’s life is differently. Think about it, what do the majority of people do in their 20’s anyways? Many spend it drinking, or going back and fourth between relationships, or even experimenting with things they’ve never tried before. That’s not my idea of the best years. Like you, I can’t stand alcohol, i’m too energetic for caffeine, and drugs aren’t something I’m okay with putting in my body. I too, have social anxiety and depression and have been dealing with them, without medication or therapy, my entire life.
I cannot say that I know exactly what you’re going through and nor will I. All I can tell you is that if you stop working, stop working on yourself, and keep focusing on negative things, you’re going to spiral further downward. If you know that this isn’t what you want, then you need to be the one to discipline yourself and pick yourself up. I know this is asking a lot, I’m aware that you may not know how, but I promise you, you absolutely can do this. You need to stop taking yourself and your thoughts so seriously. You get one life and you can either spend it miserably or happily. It’s actually funny how simple being happy is once you figure out how. It’s just a choice. Staying positive can be very difficult in the beginning, especially if you’re in the habit of thinking pessimistically but as you’ve probably figured out, it’s the hard things in life that benefit us the most. Hardships are meant to strengthen us, teach us, and give us the opportunity to grow physically and mentally. You need to see how you’re perceiving your current situation. Yes, it may be hard but you’re going to overcome it.
“Who you are today is who you were yesterday and who you will become is who you are today.”
This is just an opportunity for you to become the person you want to be. It’s going to take a lot but if you stay true, you’ll be the person you want to be. Only when you shut off your negative mindset can you become that person though. I could write a hundred pages about this but in all honesty dude, you just need to get started. Find motivation in knowing where your current choices are leading you and find motivation in becoming the man you want to be. Get a job, start exercising, get out and make it your priority to teach yourself to block out the negativity. You must begin with action. Stop accepting your depression as a reason not to do something. Stop allowing your anxiety to dictate how you interact with the world around you. Open yourself to this life you were blessed with and spend every moment you can sharing that joy with your surroundings. As someone who has been down a similar path, to do nothing and give in is the beginning of the end. Don’t ever think that you don’t deserve happiness. You do. Keep seeking help, keep refusing to give in to the suffering, and witness the man you’ll become.
“Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do.”
I hope this helps.
I have a personal blog that you might benefit from. It’s thepathofaronin.blogspot.com
Let me know if I can help or if you have any specific questions.December 24, 2014 at 3:21 am #69759AnonymousInactive
Thanks so much man.
I’ll check out the blog.
And thank you Tiffiny for your reply as well. I’ll have a look into the condition you mentioned.
Wishing you well x