I recently started seeing someone and we were talking about making things official. His aunt suddenly passed away and him and his family were devastated. He apologized at first for not being able to give me as much attention because he has been busy with family and helping them out. Now he seems more distant and I’m unsure if he’s still interested in us. I know he is grieving and the distance could 100% be because of that and not me and him. However it does make me feel sad and unsure if I should stay in this, since it does make my heart ache. He texted me on new years that he loves me and misses me and can’t wait to make memories with me in 2020, which makes me think he does want to stay together. I’m debating whether I should ask him if he wants to keep seeing each other or if he would rather us stop so he can focus on his family. We had an amazing connection before his aunt passed and I did see a future for us. How much grief can a new relationship take?
How much grief? It depends on your patience. Do you want to give him and his grief space and time? Or do you want to walk away? If you need attention from him during his grief to reassure your insecurities then best walk away else have patience.
How long has it been since his aunt died? Mark’s right that it’s your insecurities that are making your heart ache. It sounds like he has reassured you but just needs some time, especially if the death was very recently. It’s up to you whether it’s worth it to give him that time that he needs or if you can’t and need more to feel content.