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How to cope with memories and sentimental moments after breakup

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Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
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  • #115103
    Aidin M.
    Participant

    I have been through my breakup journey for over 2 weeks. This breakup hit me really hard as it brought up a lot of insecurities and self esteem problems which I am thankful for realizing these flaws and I am trying to work my way through them.

    But regardless, I was in a deep emotional relationship and my ex broke it up with no alarm which left me devastated.

    My main problem now is how to cope with all the memories and flashbacks given the fact that I am overly sentimental. even sleeping has became a challenge…

    Any suggestion would be helpful. 🙂

    #115106
    Nina Sakura
    Participant

    Give it time, cry all you want when you need to and the best way though would be to get totally immersed in something else – like a trip with friends, an event to manage which will keep u super busy – isolating yourself completely isn’t a good idea though during this time. Write down your feelings regularly when you need to and then shut the book, go outside for that walk, go meet that friend for shopping…eventually, the pain becomes bearable and things become easier.

    #115143
    anita
    Participant

    Dear aspac:

    When I feel distressed what often helps me is to get curious. I ask myself: what is there here for me to learn? It may work for you- maybe, if you get curious and ask what is there for you to learn from that relationship and the surprising breakup…?

    anita

    #115146
    eightyHD
    Participant

    I feel your pain, as i am dealing with a break up myself from a 9 year friendship, 6 year relationship.

    I find what helps me:
    1. Talk to your friends if you have any left. Someone willing to give you value into your situation.
    2. Positive affirmations during the day – try “Louise Hay Meditation” on youtube. YOU ARE WORTHY!
    3. When the going gets tough, harness that pain and anxiety and unleash the F*****G FURY at the gym until you almost drop dead!
    4. Find salvation in books, self help books, and positive messages.

    Take some time off and LET IN the anger and frustration rather than putting it off, then go to the gym.
    Some people will say keep yourself busy, but i find what helps me is to face it now rather than letting it hit you like a ton of bricks. You “keep yourself busy” is a form of masking the symptoms like taking a pill, but we all know thats not the answer.
    My best friend called me brave for not taking the pill and becoming a hopeless zombie like him. He said if he could do it all over again, he would rise from the darkness.
    THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO GO WHEN YOU HIT ROCK BOTTOM. =D

    Good luck!
    Fight it, dont run from it like your chicken shit boyfriend that cant face his own parasites.
    You are WORTHY!
    Mastery of Love – Don Miguel Ruiz

    #115225
    Aidin M.
    Participant

    Nina thank you for your comment.
    I am not sure why and how but it looks like I am holding myself somehow b/c I think letting my self go fully through the pain will bring up more memories and I am afraid that it will lead me to the path of going back to her which I am fighting against.

    #115226
    Aidin M.
    Participant

    Thank you Anita.

    I do the same, I try to rationalize the feelings and address them in a logical way and it helps sometimes but flashbacks and memories are still tough to deal with.

    #115227
    Aidin M.
    Participant

    Thank you Don.

    I am with you and know what you are talking about.
    I am trying to get back on earth and reattach myself to life as I knew:)

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