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How to interpret feelings

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  • #340646
    crawford
    Participant

    Hello, my question is in general about feelings and emotions. I know that i am responsible of how i feel but does that mean i dont have any responseibility over other peoples feelings? If i feel a certain negative feeling around someone and it makes me want to leave the person if it is not dealt with, is it my responseibility or both? If i feel someone is constantly in a positive bubble and cant accomodate for negative feelings in me, how can i adress the issue without blaming them for how i feel. In my perspective, i would have to confront them about it or let them know that i will have to leave them if it does not get resolved. This is my experience, i used to have a friend which i felt was stuck in positivity and never accomodating or taking negative aspects of others around him as part of himself. I was in pain but he could not take my pain as part of him and be with me as i am, feeling into me, being with me with the pain. This made me feel alone and that my pain was not valid, and i had to hide it to be able to be in the persons presence. I ended up confronting him about it whereas he acted as it had nothing to do with him at all, not showing me any kind of compassion or empathy. This made me leave him and our friendship. My question is, how to deal with negative feelings in relations? How much should we take into consideration others feelings as part of ourselves and in what ways are we responsible in relationship towards eachothers feelings?

     

    Thank you in advance:)

    #343014
    Melinda
    Participant

    Hi Crawford,

    First of all, your emotions are ALWAYS VALID.  Never let anyone tell you otherwise.  Negative emotions and positive emotions are always valid.  Communicating with people is very important, even if you do not think they will like the truth.  Make sure you keep people in your life that appreciate honesty and are willing to work through any conflicts you have with them and vice versa.  If the people in your life are not upholding communication and empathy, find new people.

    All emotions need outlets and healthy methods for expression.  What are you using to help you express yourself and work through your own feelings/issues?  Writing, drawing, coloring, playing a musical instrument or sport, etc. can all be helpful.

    You are not responsible for other people’s emotions.  However, you are responsible for your actions.  Think before you say/act and how it will affect both you and others involved.  Empathy is a two-way street.

    Also, though this is a great community of support, please remember that users, such as myself, and this site are not intended to provide and do not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. Nothing here is designed to replace medical or psychiatric treatment.

    Sincerely,

    Melinda

    #348960
    crawford
    Participant

    Humble answer, thank you!:)

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