Timeline so far:

• Extra solder connecting cd to radio caused me to become paranoid
• Watching tv late at night while meditating opened my mind to a lot
• Playing video games excessivly allowed me to discover the edges of my mind
• The schizm introduced caused a division.
• Online games became tedious, and were more about a corruption behind the scene.
• Online communication tried to twist who I knew were friends
• I let myself go, to find love, and nearly drowned
• Gardening caused me to see more.
• Staring at forced aversion caused me to become aware of more than the character that was portrayed.
• My new neighbors destroyed my sleep
• My education became perverted
• I stopped going because I saw the excessive interest in my actions
• A new corruption was planted on my phone
• A woman set me free with a few words, and another saw it was true the next day
• A terror scare caused a new wound with shock
• I remembered the woman from before
• I took a vaction
• A scientific Carrs model allowed me to see past the aversion
• I spotted the electronic cage that is controlling what I see, and denying me sleep.
• It is toxic, from my neighbors gossip.
• A second psychic shock forced me to go back, and even though the assumption hurt it proved me right. The problems became technological
• Allowing myself to slip showed me where the truth lay.
• So if I am denied my ability to learn why should I go back to school? If I am denied my ability to read why do I hold these books? If I had a reason to look for love before this new corruption was planted on my phone, why should I not wait for her?
• She improved herself, why shouldn’t I?However if technology is the cause, and its causing disruption. this entire thing is based on the assumption I can’t understand what happened. I know it would invariably point to an experiment that mirrors the nazi superman one.
• I trust this world more than I get credit for. I just seem to be more in tune, and able to see why the technology, if misused can lead us to war.

That’s about as far as I can think till my grey matter regrows. lol. Food, rest, retirement basically. The university degree can wait a bit. It’s in my treaty rights.

Finally back down to ground level, and still dealing with the gate in my brain. I’m tempted to re-type the entire story here, but it would hurt too many people, and it’s still ongoing. I’ll probably go on a pub crawl that means something to me. Who knows, maybe I’ll find her again.

Hi Anita,

Good timing, too. I was just about to write a bit about this whole post. I see how it can be hard to read at some points, but speaking, and languages were not a problem till recently.

Responding to your question Anita. I got my heart broken by a pornstar. I seen her prior to her career, and I can’t shake the feeling that it was something I did to cause this whole issue. All I did was look in her eyes, and she cried. I liked her, and still do. What else can I say. Everytime I see her in person though, she’s crying. The last time I saw her, I can understand why she cried. I was about to say something, and offer what aftercare that I could when I got called stupid. The comment was nothing major, but it was enough to disrupt me. I’d still like to see her, but that’s up to her. Always has been. I’d like to see her smile though.

Apart from that, the tech issues should handle themselves after a while; and this whole process seems to be making me younger. I just fit into a t-shirt I bought back in 1997. Before I grew to 400lbs, and developed this downe sydrome look to my one eye. That’s just a symptom of the concussion I suffered while on Ecstasy. The healing of a concussion takes about 13 years, and has an explosive anger component after the fact.

She, the pornstar, woke me up from a waking coma. So, I feel she deserves something nice. Who knows, maybe I’ll look better to her, the way she made herself look better to me.