Trina,

I’m sorry for your suffering, dear sister, and know how dim things can get when we become overstressed. Sometimes when we have lots of little stressors (and some big ones) we quickly become drained. Then we zombie around until we feel crappy enough to do something about it. That’s actually a great thing, because we see the zombie mental state, and can choose to grow a new one! Said differently, we quickly get tired of feeling like crud, so we learn to grow our light. A few things came to heart as I read your words.

Consider that it makes sense that you’d try to bounce into affermations, self help plans, exercise, and so forth. After all, you’re looking for your joy, contentment, and peace, which makes sense. Often though, we lose inspiration… all these activities take our precious strength, and after a short while we stop them all, or nearly. Consider instead a different strategy. Work on growing the light first, then go sort out the rest. Said differently, when we’re suffering with a lot of stress, instead of pushing even harder into some “growth spurt” of positive activity, push yourself into self nurturing, and land, take time, come home, relax. Recharge your body. Hop in the tub with candles, go for a walk in nature, play… whatever it is that helps you relax and unwind. You have a tender heart, and it deserves your gentleness. Take time to be nice to it!

One of my favorites is loving kindness meditation. Buddha taught that metta (loving kindness) helps the mind become soft, smooth. Consider “Sharon Salzburg guided metta meditation” on youtube, if interested.

Don’t be ashamed of your emotions, dear sister, even when you’re feeling crappy. As you share them, instead of bottle them, it really helps to let the past settle and move on with freshness. If you don’t have a close confidant (not the bf) to unwind with, be honest with, cry with, then consider doing some journaling or kick boxing or something, let it out. Namaste, my sweet sister, may your journey sprout with joy.

With warmth,
Matt

Wow, This blog is saving me somehow to not drain into negativity. Trina, I share exactly the same feelings.
I feel insecure for don’t know what!
I feel people don’t like me!
I feel I’m not a good person!
I feel I’m not funny!
I feel I cannot make people around me happy!

Of late I had been watching some videos on building self-esteem and self-respect, and I think that’s where my problem lies… Let’s see if it helps me to be a confident person.

Lots of positivity to you!