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I need advise. I'm lost.

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  • #84693
    Name
    Participant

    I feel lost and disorganized.
    I’m not sure who I am or what my purpose is.
    But how do I build my character?
    What do I have to do to create the person I want to be?
    I want to be someone who can innovate and lead.
    Someone who has charisma and influence.
    I want to lead and influence people.
    How do I become this?
    What is my goal.
    Or should I have multiple goals?
    Maybe I should build a latter of goals.
    And climb that latter.
    But how?
    What advise do I need?
    Who should I seek?
    I want to find reason.
    I want to be someone.

    #84705
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Name:

    You are someone. Learn who that someone is, the little things, as you go about your day, learn about yourself anything you can learn: how you feel about this or that, what you value and what you do not value? What do you like about other people’s behaviors and what do you dislike (Most likely you like and dislike the same things about yourself as you do in others)?

    What color do you like? Do you like the ocean? The dessert? What excites you? What bores you?

    What is your name and what name would you like instead?

    Before embarking on a grand task as to influence people and lead people, learn the small things about yourself. Nothing really, is to small to learn.

    anita

    anita

    #84706
    anita
    Participant

    ,,,

    #84708
    Name
    Participant

    @anita

    Thank you for your reply. I want to know how to build my traits. I want to know how I can see the improvements. I like genuine and honest people and that’s the kind of person I believe I am. But I want to be more. I want to be charismatic, bold, imaginative, strong-willed. I want to know what I should do, what advise you can give me.

    #84710
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Name:

    Please re-read my comment to you about learning the “small” things about yourself before you reach out for MORE –
    anita

    #84711
    Name
    Participant

    @anita
    There are too many small things. It’s endless and I will never get to the bigger things if I just focus on the small things.

    #84723
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Name:

    You will never get to the bigger things if you do NOT focus on the small things, this is my advice to you.

    anita

    #84741
    Jeroen
    Participant

    Dear Name,

    I feel exactly the same. I want to improve my social skills, i want to know what kind of job i want. I want to enhance myself into the person i want to be. But each time when its up to me, i just give up and focus on something pointless like entertainment to ignore the fact to deal with the situation.

    It just feels like there is so much to improve that its an endless task. Even when its a small improvement it just doesnt feel like enough for me to turn into the person i want to be

    Just wanted you to know you’re not alone

    #84758
    anita
    Participant

    * Dear Jeroen:

    I hope that you (and Name) somehow exercise the extreme PATIENCE with yourself that self improvement requires. You have a strong desire to become someone you are not right now. You are not lacking in will power. What you are lacking is realistic thinking about HOW to achieve your goal. You think it is faster than it is. You think the way to go about it is to aim at BIG, distant goals while the way to go about self improvement is aiming at one small goal at a time, a goal that is not so tough to achieve. Like a small child that wants to fly an airplane, first the child needs to walk, and exercise walking without falling, then run, then… one step at a time until he is ready to fly an airplane.

    anita

    #85080
    Mike
    Participant

    You need to start somewhere and it seems you have somewhat a starting point in that you have a list of possible questions that you want to answer and some things you want, you just don’t know how to get answers. You should also think about where you want to be and what you see yourself doing later down the road. From there start researching the great people who like you wanted what you want and got, those who succeeded. History is full of these people, you don’t have to look far research these people and most have written memoirs, how to books, or have biographies. These people exist today, and of course I am saying to look at the super achievers, but you don’t have just look at them. Find the every day people that doing what you want to be doing, if you don’t know what you want to be doing then research and talk to people doing various things find out what their lives are. The internet has information on everything, and it is easy to find community boards of these people just like tinybuddha where they talk about their “stuff” and most of them love to help people interested in what they do. Maybe there is even someone local that would be willing to talk to you.

    #85110
    krishnakumari
    Participant

    Dear Name

    The feeling of getting lost is a good sign. it indicates that you are ready to take a leap and move forward. Spiritually speaking this unrest is because the mind, soul and body are not in unison.
    There is nothing you cannot achieve. but it needs discipline. Every possibility in within you.
    You already have a position in life, in society and in your family. start from there.
    do your functions in these positions to the 100%. you will gradually find yourself calming down and having time for other things.
    leading people, having charisma is not something you need to learn and operate on. it will come naturally when you become calm and know things for sure from within.
    may be a morning meditation and an evening meditation for even 10 minutes to start with is good.
    or even chanting a mantra for 10 min is good.
    read motivating books and slowly do an inside journey. you need to clear the clutter inside and then when you become peaceful, everything else falls in place.

    krishna

    #85241
    Name
    Participant

    Thank you both for your answers. I will take your advise in consideration.

    #85261
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Name:

    You are welcome and please post again after your consideration!

    anita

    #85269
    Saiisha
    Participant

    Name and Jerome – you’ve received some brilliant advice on here! I personally love the idea of learning what your joys (small things) are – that’s one of the surest ways to finding your purpose.

    However, if you’re interested, I have a coaching session called Discover Your Dharma – the 7 Step Path to Your Purpose. Check it out and see if this is for you – http://www.nestintheforest.com/discover-your-dharma/

    Namaste,
    Saiisha

    #85323
    jock
    Participant

    You can also try my Skype session called “discovering the llama within”.
    Discount if you have a weird sense of humour like mine.

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